Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Message from a Solider

My people listen to me,
Don’t cry, if I die,
I’ll always be with you,
I will take rebirth for you,
Protect you all the time,
Don’t cry, if I die…

My parents listen to me,
Don’t cry, if I die,
It doesn’t matter if don’t show up to night,
Think that your son has lived long and he’s having good night,
Don’t shed your tear after watching my body with bullets,
Otherwise, I’ll have rough night,
Don’t cry, if I die…

My daughter listens to me,
Don’t cry, if I die
I’m not coming home,
I think this is my last talk,
I want to say you something always help your mom,
When you will grow up become a doctor help this world,
Forgive me if I don’t come tonight,
Don’t cry, if I die…

My son listens to me,
Don’t cry, if I die,
I want you to be a solider like me,
Serving your life to motherland it should be your dream,
Promise me, you will be responsible for whole world,
I want you to make me feel proud,
Doesn’t matter if I’m not coming home,
I always want you to smile,
Don’t shed your tears if I die,
Don’t cry, if I die…

My love listens to me,
I’m not leaving you alone,
You have my precious diamond with you,
Take care of those,
I love you what else could I say,
Promise me, that you will be strong after me,
Take care of my family, don’t cry for me,
When you’ll burry me graveyard, burry me with smile,
Don’t cry my love, if I die,
Don’t cry, if I die…

My motherland listens to me,
I will die for you more than 100 times,
I will spread blood of my enemy if they look into your eyes,
And I’ll live my life for you,
It doesn’t matter what other relation ties me,
I’ll ready to give you my head all the time,
My motherland don’t cry if I die,
Don’t cry if I die…

Last to my enemies,
Don’t come to my motherland,
if you come for her, I’ll come for you,
Your dream will remain as a dream,
I don’t need a weapon to burry you,
You will laugh on my death for one day,
You will laugh at Schrey for one day,
You will face death for another day,
The difference between me and you is love,
If you ever come to my motherland,
You will be gone forever....

Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
Respect 'Solider'. You all are safe because of them. I hope you enjoy it.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content


Hi Shrey, powerful words, indeed. Don't you mean Soldier for the title? As this is a long prose poem, I shall have to return for more reads. For now, I think the content is fine, I agree with your feelings and narrative. Not so sure about the spacing, it needs lots cut out, IMO. Your beginning and end are fine.
Will come back, Gracy

"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

(c) No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.