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Many Summers Past A poem NOW RE-composed in 2009 EDIT SIR RICHARDSON AN AUSSIE READ BY OVER 1350

Many Summers Past

Many summers past, we were standing,
for each other’s dates anxiously waiting.
it was then our eyes did glance,
and their arrival we forgot, perchance.

it was then your eyes transfixed mine,
yes it was within our domain, we felt fine,
we stared and glanced and blushed,
at each other’s arms, naturally we rushed.
it was at the spur of moment God granted,
it was our union for ever which was supplanted.

That moment we still remember even now,
it’s good our meeting was fortunate somehow.
ever since we have always remained merged,
totally in each other’s concern submerged.

Still today you know, we remember that hour,
we spent in the drizzling or rainy shower,
when we joined for a long communication,
truly it was meant to be a lasting association...

It was the best of our life’s moments,
passed we have through many a torments,
though it was over a few decades away,
but it still seems as if ‘twas just yesterday.

Yes, many years have lapsed away.

Older Version

Many summers past, we were standing,
For each others dates anxiously waiting.
It was then our eyes did glance,
And their arrival we forgot, perchance.

It was then your eyes transfixed mine,
Yes it was with in our domain, we felt fine,
We stared and glanced and blushed,
At each others arms, naturally we rushed.
It was at the spur of moment God granted,
It was our union for ever which was supplanted.

That moment we still remember even now,
It’s good our meeting was fortunate somehow.
Ever since we have always remained merged,
Totally in each others concern submerged.

Still today you know, we remember that hour,
We spent in the drizzling or rainy shower,
When we joined for a long communication,
Truly it was meant to be a lasting association...

It was the best of our life’s moments,
Passed we have through many a torments,
Though it was over a few decades away,
But it still seems as if ‘twas just yesterday.

(Yes, many years have lapsed away.)
NOTE
Many Summers Past was composed a couple of years ago. Was edited by Sir Richardson the Poet from AUSTRALIA.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

I do not understand the title "1344", and feel the last line is redundant and not needed. I am thinking the poem is also titled "Many Summers past"

The poem is like one written by an Andrew Marvel. Very romantic, I like the length of the lines and consistency of them in form, it creates a mature poem. Although written with some archaic words and phrases, (perchance, twas) the poem has a simple elegance and rejoice, and remains focused throughout.

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

Many Summers Past was composed a couple of years ago.
Was edited by Sir Richardson the Poet from AUSTRALIA.
Please read my Note
1344 views* this poem has received elsewhere on other sites.
Thank you EUmol for being the first
and perhaps the only one here
to view and comment too.
So many *Enjoyed my Summer

I am ignorant about the poet you name here
Thank you all the same
and for the honour

author comment

Interesting poem.
There is a story, and an ache, and longing.

Since it has been written about two years ago,
would you want to write it again?
Sorry if you find my question weird.

IRiz

this is now a ''bottled''
poem

I don't really enjoy archaic poetic style
but all call me
archaic....
'twas and ere
they damn care!!!!

A Western Author USA Lady of 7 books to her credit
calls me unique
she has read me since over a decade
can you believe it....

You may rewrite this as a modern one
in your sweet young tongue
I will include it as your contribution
in my sixth forthcoming book
and
second poem one
believe me
CREDIT will be given to you.

author comment

I thought to see how you might have change.
It is just interesting. Why would I rewrite what is good? I better tell you what I was doing this morning.
I went for a short run in the woods on the back of my house. It is very bright morning, sun goes right through all the bare branches and through the roofs it is unusually bright in my room. I am still breathing hard from the run and my cheeks burn. I saw a half frozen creeck, surrounded by white ornament of half melted snow and ducks busily digging into the silt showing only their butts. The air was fun to breath. Why don't you go for a walk ? Or it is already night in your corner of the globe?

IRiz

I walk a lot see ...all around
as does a clot

once a gal told me
when I was younger
''you appeared to be a dope watching every nook and corner''

I replied
''only a dope
can cope....'''
and s
o at every incident of my walk
mentally I composed and sang also
then I had a voice
now it's the winter of my life
I learned poetry issues from visuals
I loved seeing nature and gals and guys
admiring it

so when i returned
I remembered a lot
did I then my thoughts jot
and
it became a poem
some here call me a clot
they don't know I am the poet at every spot

Glad you come across my site
devyuska you are bright
stay within vision you right
some day read all my 13000 plus you might.

Thanks for stream lining my mind
I like friends of your kind
I forget the russkee for ''friend''
! tell me again
Do svidaniya
its cold tonight

author comment

Goodbye and hello again
Stop talking about yourself in past time
It pisses me off when my friends
do not live with me on the same plain.
In the multidimensional space
it is so easy to be lost.
So stick to the present moment.
Let's live to the best of our might.
And see how slowly
it turns intoTIME.

IRiz

what of yesterday or tomorrow
no way
I make the present
present right away
and poet friend do stay
you make my mind come alive
as you say
live the moment
age is No barrier
we learn till our last moment
and yet die quite ignorant
till then wait 4 a tomorrow
when we come out with another
poem each one

author comment

Cool I am working on one now

IRiz

I would say a recount of a good reminisce put into verse

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

I is SUB _lime
sub reduces the bar
over which we jump over
6 feet lower
lesser than pole vault
life is now over
I can't skip an inch
unless some one does me pinch

author comment
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