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Maelstrom

Maelstrom

Transcendental soldiers riding
steeds of mindless steel
clad in trappings suitable for war
patriotic slogans hiding
what they really feel
knowing they have done it all before

shades of souls that never rest
burn them like a flame
and spur them on to deeds they’ll never tell
each of them within his breast
concealing bitter shame
for helping stoke the fire pits of Hell

blood runs red as minions die
performing in a play
directed by political decree
theirs is not to reason why
but only to obey
fighting for the honor to be free

free to breathe polluted air
free to pay their tithe
free to live in cities full of crime
free to subsidize the lair
of those who wield the scythe
and reap the profits of a people’s time

let the steel steeds turn to rust
let the trappings fall
let ghosts of soldiers past no longer thrive
living life is more than just
and giving it is all
one really needs to fully be alive

C. Lon R. Bruso

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

I am speechless. This is so powerful. You needn't me tell you so Lonnie, I'm sure you already know, but I wanted to say hello and thanks for such a post.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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Having been through such as this it becomes easier to write about the consequences! Thanks for the feedback!

author comment

this one hits hard. very nice.

oh and, by the way, may I post this to the blog?

Mag

Yes, you may use it, as long as I get a small amount of credit for writing it! LOL!! Thanks for the read and the comment!

author comment

credit where credit is due, that's the policy. here it is :)

http://neopoetofficial.tumblr.com/

Yes, This is a powerful and beautiful write.

keep well, my friend

joe

Hope all is going well for you these days! Good to hear from you!

author comment

Powerful
Love judy
xxx

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

Glad you liked the poem and left me some nice feedback!

author comment
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