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love tis HIS

he came to go

You have gone like a summer’s eve
the desert wind to grieve
leaving mankind to believe
there is no love to relieve

gone with the summers eve
the wind
the breeze
now tis time for love to freeze

come back as the tremor does
and
fly on the back of the wind in turn
come from the wilderness
where I believe
from where you your loved one
want to retrieve...
make it a belief ....

HIS....

The first love
what a jolt
I thought it was a bolt
from you
from the blue
but the moon was still smiling
my lovely friend at you

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

Your theme is great and the words flow well but try not to get carried away, pull back and read it again then you will see the flow goes off at a tangent a little in the middle of this piece, I know you can write up there with the rest so take more care, Yours as always, Ian

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Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

temperature ?
no...
tight schedule
will do
u help too

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