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Love Is Painful
When I saw you on the street
You were wiggling oh so sweet,
Then I tripped over my own feet.
I said "Hello, sidewalk
Let’s have a talk.”
With sweater tight as pantyhose
Showing off your pair of those
Dang it! Now I’ve blooded my nose.
I said "Hello, brick wall,
Will that be all?"
You sashayed into the room
And I promptly tripped over a broom;
The sound was like a sonic boom!
I said "Hello there floor,
Let's chat some more."
Then I saw your shapely hips,
The smile upon your ruby lips,
And now my front teeth have chips!
I said "Hello, iron post,
You hurt me the most!"
Love as far as I can see,
Is as painful as can be,
For Doctor visits are not free.
I said "Goodbye paycheck,
Damned if I haven’t sprained my neck!"
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words:
This is another old one that I have made revisions on. It originally came about by remembering how pretty girls turn men's heads and from observing guys at the mall when pretty women would walk by. I decided we men need to laugh at ourselves.
Editing stage:
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Comments
Barbara Writes
Sun, 2012-06-03 19:11
Very good laugh for mankind
Very long blush for womankind if you will lol.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
Rett
Mon, 2012-06-04 00:07
Thanks Barbara
Glad you got a laugh and a blush out of it. :)
Respectfully,
Rett
"If all printers were determined not to print anything till they were sure it would offend nobody, there would be very little printed. " Ben Franklin
believe
Mon, 2012-06-04 01:51
funny
A funny look at desire , Love, Etc,
nice little rhyming poem
I had a laugh ...thanks
ray
Rett
Mon, 2012-06-04 12:02
Thanks, Ray
Glad you got a little chuckle.
Respectfully,
Rett
"If all printers were determined not to print anything till they were sure it would offend nobody, there would be very little printed. " Ben Franklin
Ian.T
Wed, 2012-06-06 09:27
Rett
Loved this one blinded by love and clumsy as hell, Great write,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Rett
Wed, 2012-06-06 20:23
Thank you Ian
If we can't poke fun at our own foibles, how can we poke fun at others? LOL
Respectfully,
Rett
"If all printers were determined not to print anything till they were sure it would offend nobody, there would be very little printed. " Ben Franklin