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Look To My Back

Look To My Back

If you look to my back
A story you would see
The hardships I endured
Moments I put my family before me
Moments my freedom was more important

If you look to my back
You will see moments less than a human I became
Moments less than a man I became
Times I hesitated because family was more important
A tree illustrated from the lashes
A design of my pain, ownership and pride

If you look to my back
My life ends there
If I ever knew hope it was taken away from me
A piece of my soul escaped from there
Transferring itself in my future generations

If you look to my back
Touch every inch of it
Feel the impressions I made from it
Absorb the emotions I gave from it

If you look to my back
Where the whip cracked and landed
Where I became nude
Where I got to the point of no movement
You would not change places with me

Look to my back
There is a story for you
A story of freedom, suffrage and sadness
A story worth repeating
A story worth understanding

Look to my back…

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

This poem exudes the feelings felt during such changing and trying times

author comment

I must admit the use of your title gave pause for a moment
I found it unusual
welcome to Neo Poet

Let your mercy spill on all those
burning hearts in hell( L.Cohen)
join us for chat every [email protected];30 pm est

May I say welcome to neopoet, I felt every whip. It made me feel incredibly sad but I know it was the intention in this poem to feel pain. I cannot help but see the comment above from
C Lynn Brookes, your title.look to my back, could easy be changed to a portrait of a man or even a portrait of me. I just had to say. This is a workshop so we can leave our thoughts hopefully sometimes we get it right for the writer of the poem. Your title being the theme and very obvious inside this work. A very powerful emotional poem.

Thank you...Teddy

Hello!
Oh, my...your poem is stunning. Excellent, really. As I was reading, I felt each strike, each sacrifice. So, so touching. Quite extraordinary in feeling and emotion. Truly, it has touched me deeply. Your title is perfect. I see your back so vividly, each and every painful scar.
Thank you,
Lavender

I'm seeing here that you have entered this as a workshop poem under "A Concert to Remember." I am wondering if this was in error and you actually have a personal entry.

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