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IN LIGHT OF FUTURE DAYS
Sometimes in darkness late at night
questions and doubts assail my aging mind
as I search for Truth's clear light.
To my own faults must I be truly blind?
I'm aware time edits memories
else how could I live with past mistakes,
pervasive as an autumn breeze,
lessened for peace of mind's sakes?
That athlete which I recall,
I doubt that I was quite that good
when I played football in the fall
cheered by folks within my neighborhood.
How do others Really perceive me?
Tact demands truth stays untold.
Can I ever see just what they see;
am I just an old fool growing old?
I reckon that I'll never see.
I'll never break through ego's haze
unless it somehow comes to be
I can see with the light from future's days.
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
weirdelf
Mon, 2015-08-10 12:33
I envy you.
My past errors, lies, sins, knowing harm, even evil haunt me to the point where a sudden recall cripples me doubled up in the street with shame or so preoccupies me I walk into a telegraph pole.
Sure I know my kindness, generosity and goodness as the better part of my nature so where is self-forgiveness? How does one come by it?
By the way, I'm not going to parse this but the workshops you have done on meter are clearly having a positive influence.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
scribbler
Mon, 2015-08-10 17:03
No need
for envy. We all have our share of regrets due to past mistakes. Likely the cruelest word in the English language is "If". And I also doubt it's possible for anybody to see themselves as others see them. Some people see themselves as better than they really are and some as worse. Only time and history can really tell the truth of a person. And thanks for the comment that my writing is improving............stan
author commentlovedly
Tue, 2015-08-11 23:11
we just arrived from the past
a movie fast forward
as future twas past!
go see it tis nice
you Stan will like it!
all about trilliotons of energy
in human beings
scribbler
Wed, 2015-08-12 18:36
Yes
there's a lot of energy in each of us. The law of conservation of energy states energy can't be created or destroyed, it can only be changed. This alone tells me that at least our energy will outlive us in some manner.........stan
author commentweirdelf
Mon, 2016-02-29 07:28
cool, lovedly
a good response. I suspect that my protracted absence is making you rely more on your strong native intelligence than provoking reaction. I salute you, sir/madam.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Sparrow
Wed, 2015-08-12 19:37
Stan
IF, No there is no if in the language of the universe though there is "I did".
Ask of all man and they will say I Did, then with a pause they will say, I should have.
It makes no difference in the great plan of all things that go on.
Your memories are sacred to your being and map all that you have done and sent out in your thoughts to the great universes ear.
All people are basically good and seek out like souls in their struggle for perfection, but who worries well all of us,.
A great write there young woodsman, another journey portrayed from your thoughts, and they seem to be purging your system and putting things in order.
You take care and know that you are a good man.
Yours Ian..
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
scribbler
Wed, 2015-08-12 21:18
Hi Ian
I'm not too sure that all people are basically good. Too many commit atrocities without reason. Here in S.C. a youngster worshiped with a black bible study group then killed 3 of them. Then there's ISIS who seem determined to drive the world back into the dark ages........sigh..... but there Are a lot of good people who nobody ever hears about.............stan
author commentSparrow
Thu, 2015-08-13 03:58
Stan
Those that are bad and do bad things to others will spend their spirit time with like souls, Murderers with murderers and robbers with robbers, Then the good people that will find a level as they were here.
Hey I'm trying to be good lol, Yours Ian..
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
weirdelf
Mon, 2016-02-29 07:34
"All people are basically good"
no, all people are a blank slate and from there make choices. I do believe all people are basically good, it is the basis of the success of homo sapien, working together.
People who say things like "it's a dog eat dog world" forget that one can choose not to be a dog.
Love you, love the poem.
Don't hassle me about my current poetry phobia, I will be back soon and as annoying as ever,
cheers
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
scribbler
Mon, 2016-02-29 08:16
Hey Jess
Go to see you popping back in. I sometimes think the worst people are somehow wired wrong. The mass murderers, the cannibals, the serial rapists, the serial liars(like Hillary Clinton)............stan
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