Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Left Alone...
He felt a presence behind him
As he cut through flesh and bone
He said; I thought you gone away
I thought I was alone
"I just couldn’t bear to leave you
It didn’t seem right to me
I’m not complete when I’m alone
I need you, can’t you see?"
As he spoke, his voice was moving
Sir Gee said; "If truth be told
I thought our bond improving
If I might be so bold"
Now what the Hell made you think that?
I like the way I am
Your head is empty ‘neath your hat
Understand that if you can
Join me for a meal, Sir Gee
"No, you don’t get me that way"
It’s good for you, you’ll see
"Oh no, not any day"
I think you’re scared, you’ll like it
The Darkside ain’t so bad
You’ll see, it can be a lot of fun
The best time you’ve ever had
Sir Gee must look away
He can’t stand the scene
Blood is pooling ‘round his feet
Killer’s grin is so damned mean
As he follows down the alleyway
Sir Gee’s head is lost in thought
What will I do, in heaven’s name
If he’s ever caught?
Anubis was there to greet them
when they came through the door
He licked Sir Gee’s face and hand
‘Till Killer said; No more!
I don’t know why he likes you, Gee
Says his evil twin
I wish he’d tear your throat out
You’re not like me, except your skin
"Anubis knows I love him
He knows I wouldn’t do him harm
He sees my heart and hears my thoughts
I feel his pain and that’s my charm"
Don’t forget, I feel it too
We three are all a part of each
Our pain is all intertwined
Yet it’s just out of reach
"Well, will wonders never cease?
On this, we will both agree
I never thought I’d see the day
When this close, we’d be"
While Killer spoke, he kept on cooking
He added spices and he stirred
Chopping steaks, he seared them
The sound of sizzle could be heard
Smells like garlic and tomatoes
Whiffs of delight to Sir Gee’s nose
His stomach rumbled; he was tempted
He thought he’d better go
Some day you’ll stay to eat with me
Gee looked back and shook his head
"I never will, I promise you
It’s the thing that I most dread"
"If I did, I would lose myself
You would lose me too
This part of us would be no more
There would be just you"
Killer didn’t say it
But the thought occurred to him
I might just have a chance
I could really win
As Sir Gee walked down the alley
He felt sorrow and he cried
For he knew it had been close
A part of him had almost died
No one can know with certainty
Their full identity
Prisoners of our other selves
Wishing we were free
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
User login
Author information
Region & Country
New York State - USA
Favorite Poets
Poe, Emily Dickenson, Robert Frost, Shakespeare, and many of the poets here at Neopoet.
Other recent work
Active Workshops & Contests
Contest
Workshop
- Splash Pool: How to use imagery in poetry..
- Wading Pool: Neopoet How To Video Resources
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 2
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 1
- Plunge Pool: Stream Workshop
Comments
loved
Tue, 2012-07-03 02:23
epicurial
but for once
I read it all
for I just did a sermon recall
....'''If you don't read others they won't you....'''''
loved
Geezer
Wed, 2012-07-04 01:22
You always...
know the right thing to say. Thanks, ~ Gee.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author commentloved
Wed, 2012-07-04 01:49
from you all
I learn
and
thanks
loved
BlueDemon77
Tue, 2012-07-03 03:49
Very accomplished and intense poem
On an emotional level, this made me feel exactly like I did at the end of Jonathan Carroll's Land of Laughs or with the knock on the door in The Monkey's Paw. The character(s) are well written, the craftsmanship sure and aware of each nuance of the story being told. All in all, this is the best Dramatic Narrative poem I've encountered here. It was filled with swirling shadows where words needn't be placed, it's most pedestrian dialog pregnant with dangerous and subtle secondary meanings. Highest Kudos. You brought the darkness and in a poet's way. I agree with you. I write a lot of things that share this kind of horror influence, among them the already posted Fear, Why, Innsmouth Sonnet, and Unforgiven. I'd love to have you at my Chat on Friday, July 13th, where I plan to call on the participants to pour forth their darkest works. It would be the greatest honor to have you there. If Poe or Lovecraft (or even moments of Coleridge) didn't teach the world that poetry and horror aren't mutually exclusive, I think it's about time someone did. Will you join me on 7/13/12 and help our more restrained counterparts find their visceral work? I would be greatly honored if you were to do so. Fantastic poem!
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Geezer
Wed, 2012-07-04 01:46
Thanks for...
the kudos. If you are interested, there are more Killer poems that may shed some light on the basic character of Killer. He has evolved over some period of time here. I am so glad to make your acquaintance. There are many who appreciate Killer and his epicurial traits. He is a gourmet cook, who just happens to also be a cannibal. Sir Gee is his alter-ego, who consistantly tries to keep him under control and Anubis is a dog that Killer rescued from certain death after being abandoned by a dog-fighter. I will read your works to gain a better understanding of your background and yes, I will try to make it to your chat. There are others here that I'm sure will join us in our efforts to bring out the darkside in us all. I will post a sticky note to join you on that Friday. I have to go now, I have to get up again in another couple of hours to go to work. ~ Geezer
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author commentBlueDemon77
Tue, 2012-07-03 03:51
Workshop starts at 9 PM on 7/13/12
Forgot to say that the first time.
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Ian.T
Tue, 2012-07-03 10:21
Gee Zuz
What a mess he is in cannot eat with what maybe his friend. Licked to death by what I think is a cat yet the love they give is dark where to love is to kill.
To do a favour is to devour the flesh yet a tear may have shed but it is that the wind in the alley was cold.
I will await to see if the killer finds himself again and kills some more, will he leave some morsels outside for me to find,
Yours, "Gyps fulvus" of the night.
PS:- You will not see me as my flight is silent on nights gentle breeze, alone I will feast...
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Geezer
Wed, 2012-07-04 01:51
No real time...
to answer in depth, but Anubis is a dog that Killer has rescued from an alley where he was abandoned after being defeated in a dog-fight. Killer will be finding more victims in the near future and surely will be inviting you to a meal soon. ~ Geezer
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author commentIan.T
Wed, 2012-07-04 02:37
Gee
My Memory playing tricks again with Anubis:-
Anubis was the god of embalming and the dead.
Since jackals were often seen in cemeteries, the ancient Egyptians believed that Anubis watched over the dead.
Anubis
Anubis was the god who helped to embalm Osiris after he was killed by Seth. Thus, Anubis was the god who watched over the process of mummifying people when they died.
Priests often wore a mask of Anubis during mummification ceremonies.
I am going to take out a contract with Mother care on that Killer and his mangy dog lol, Yours Gyps fulvus
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Geezer
Wed, 2012-07-04 19:19
No need for that...
Sir Gee has them both well-in-hand.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author commentIan.T
Thu, 2012-07-05 04:26
Gee
My time wont permit me to be there on the Dark side with you, it is during my night and I am far too busy out and about feasting, to be able to join your dark group.
Please give them my best wishes, and I hope that some of them pass my way one night in a darkened place, there I will suck the life out of them Ha Ha, my nickname here is "King Leech" and it pleases me so, that I am the best at my wonderful work.
I remember when I was younger I use to waste such a lot of things, when I stripped those tasty morsels down to the bone, hearing them scream only sang a love theme in my gnarled ears.
They talk of the Sirens of old, well they would shrink into a soft purr when I started with the younger ones..
I am going into my Dark room now as that damn sun is up again,
Yours with hope that it is in the dark of night we meet, "Son of Draugr "
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
BlueDemon77
Thu, 2012-07-05 07:48
Hi Geezer
I'd like to place a take out order of a liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti......slurp slurp slurp slurp slurp.......
Ron
Blue Demon77
"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."
The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath
Ian.T
Thu, 2012-07-05 09:40
Ron
I do hope they are kidney Beans in a livery of blood. And a Bloody Mary as a chaser, I would definitely chase her Ha Ha
"Son of Draugr"
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Geezer
Thu, 2023-11-23 17:38
Unfortunately...
as I was posting the new and improved poem, I inadvertently lost the new poem and had to replace it with the old one.
I guess I had too much eggnog and brandy. LoL
I changed a few things but am too tired to do the whole thing all over again. Maybe I will try it again or do another one that shows the Killer and Sir Gee relationship. ~ Geezer.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author commentCandlewitch
Fri, 2023-11-24 07:14
Dear Geezer,
I think you wrote and posted this poem when I was down with medical difficulties that I was fighting my way back from. Anyway... I am glad I found my way to it... It is sublime! I love the on-going conversation between the characters. It is so multiple personalities!
eddy styx says to tell you that he likes these lines as they resonate:
I think you’re scared, you’ll like it
The Darkside ain’t so bad
You’ll see, it can be a lot of fun
The best time you’ve ever had
(Dark side is two words?.) and I am curious about this line: "He said; I thought you gone away" should it be: you'd instead of you? or you had?
This is a poem that requires more than one reading! I shall be back!
*ever, eddy styx
*hugs and love, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Geezer
Fri, 2023-11-24 09:46
The Darkside...
stems from when I had the chat going.
I just write it that way and I don't get any fuss from the AI spelling whatevers.
Yes, I would imagine that eddy would like those lines. I don't know about you,
but I have heard that line: "I thought you gone away" in some of the more
British type of writing. [Killer likes to affect a British accent at times].
There is another poem of similar ilk, that I will rewrite as soon as I have finished
rewriting the rewrite. LoL I was very tired and had a headache coming on
and lost the rewrite, so I had to post the original with whatever I could remember
from the rewrite. I will try to do better. Maybe I can repost it and then do the rewrite of the other one.
Will sort the whole thing out shortly. ~ Geez.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author commentCandlewitch
Sun, 2023-11-26 17:38
Dear Geez and boys,
I vaguely remember the chats on the Darkside! Chrys was there, too! I look forward to reading whatever you write. I think tomorrow I shall take the time to read through some of your older poems to see what I have missed.
*hugs & love, Cat
p.s.
was Lou there too?
*ever, eddy styx
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Geezer
Sun, 2023-11-26 20:48
Yes...
Lou was there, along with a lot of the older ones. Steven, Stan, Seren etc...
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author comment