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the last time i was lost (and then found)

your skin sparkles in the sunlight
shine your light on me
beautiful vampire boy
you’re only 119

your families a little bit crazy
jasper gives me a fright
but rosalie’s really hot
shoot my shot with her i might

edward cullen you’re my love
i’d never betray you
except for maybe rosalie
she’s one of the good few

once i was lost
but then you found me
in the small town of forks
from you, i’ll never flee

edward cullen i know i’m young
but it’s legal in some countries
i want you too drive me to costco
for good when i get the munchies

you’re car is really nice
and your house is really nice
i’m attracted to your wealth edward
your skin is cold as ice

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
i hope you enjoy this poem as much as i enjoy edward cullens delicious facial bone structure
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

you shouldn't just assume that we (the reader) have read the same book, watched the same movie or television show. I don't know who these people are that you mentioned. perhaps you should give us a clue by filling out the proper space before you hit the enter button. I get the idea this has something to do with vampires?

always, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

thanks! it’s from the twilight series. #teamedward

author comment

vampires! I have read a couple of the books and seen one of the movies. "Twilight" I wasn't too interested in them, as I took them to be something for the tweens and younger set, but since then, I have had occasion to see advertisements on TV for another movie which I will probably watch. I see by the shortness and quick ending, that you were in a hurry to post. I understand. I would take the time to finish this a little more. It is always a thrill to post and see what people think of your work, but sometimes it's better to work on it a bit more to get the ending right. [Not that it wasn't right], just that it seems hurried].
Keep up the good work and keep writing, I'm anxious to see what you can do. ~ Geezer.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

hello geezer! thank you so much for your advice. i will think about taking longer on my next poem. #teamedward

author comment

a literal masterpiece omfg. i love you mermaid master you've done it again!!!!

Maddie Sweeney

thanks nerdface smell ya later

author comment
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