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A Kiss In A Dream

Her lips were red and occupied with giggles,
so I planted a wet one on her cheeks.
She said I was a coward,
so I kissed her on her lips to prove
I was a man.

I kissed her in a dream,
and sent her packing all the way back home,
just before sunrise.

She thought I lied,
she said I made it up.

but I did, I said,
for all my dreams are lies, you see?

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
a true story.
Editing stage: 

Comments

Well don't know whether you are coming or going on this one.
Very interesting to throughout,
you may awake to reality one grand morning and think it but a dream,
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

you got the point of this poem. It is about dreams. Thanks for enjoying it. :)

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

http://www.wsgeorge.com/

author comment

What can I say this one had a twist I really liked it, I cant see that I can offer anything in the way of crit, you've got it all here, well done

regards Jayne-Chloe

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

Thanks for dropping by again!! :)

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

http://www.wsgeorge.com/

author comment

u kiss a poem... once in a way
that too in a dream
and doubt your own manliness

You kiss a poem... once in a way
I kiss all over
anyone

but kisses me
just no one

so daily I compose
A KISS POEM!

It satisfies my inner urge
as desire
from inside does surge...
Where are they
who kissed me one day,
now they my love and kisses betray

have they forgotten the lips given
and those ones secretly taken
but then I was young
now old
sans teeth ...white ones
now unfold as dentures
so how would kiss me
anyone...

loved

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