Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Killing the Jungle

land
estates
no matter
who owns it now
the trees are falling
lopped off by huge machines
(steel has no fondness for life)
wipe out the great lush green jungle
to put in a road and a pipeline
communities are killed by greedy men

https://soundcloud.com/user-992937220/killing-the-jungle?si=4d1d07383fc7...

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

your title to be simple without making me search for the meaning. [I like that].
Your simplistic piece, contains all one needs to get the message and the thoughts contained within.
I especially liked the aside that [steel has no fondness for life]. I'm not sure if the layout was purposely made
to echo the thought of simply life and land then increasingly complex lines to mimic the threat of man and machines
but it certainly did that. Nice work, nothing to crit.~ Geez.
.

Vote for your favorite poem of the year!
The winner gets a
$100 prize and one-year full premium!
Go to the Forum or The Neopoet News
and use the survey to vote. Most votes wins the prize!

.

actually it is an Etheree type poem. Starts with a one syllable line and progresses to 10.
I hadn't thought of it your way, but yes!
Thanks,

Please vote for the Neopoet of the year here:
https://www.neopoet.com/forum/30284

author comment

Your words speak volumes of truth The balance of nature to mans greed is way off but where and what is the solution

Chrys

check out our chat room open to all 24/7

Man is such a destructive animal huh?
Later,
Mark
.

Please vote for the Neopoet of the year here:
https://www.neopoet.com/forum/30284

author comment

We hear so much about the destruction of equatorial jungles but ignore the cutting of the temperate jungles here at home. Any suggestions I'd make would mess up the form of your poem

Thanks for dropping in,
mark
.

Please vote for the Neopoet of the year here:
https://www.neopoet.com/forum/30284

author comment

We haman's are naturally greedy, we consume more than we produce and that is affecting us in one way or another. It's a good one.

It has been said that we are more like a virus..
Later,
Mark

Please vote for the Neopoet of the year here:
https://www.neopoet.com/forum/30284

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.