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Kalon
spring lady beetles
destroy soft, sap-filled aphids-
faultless peach roses
Style / type:
Structured: Eastern
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage:
Contest:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Ray Whitaker
Thu, 2021-06-03 09:02
Used to buy ladybugs from bug sellers
To keep the bad one at bay. Here in NC, there are so many bad bugs.
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Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
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Geezer
Thu, 2021-06-03 12:12
Yes...
that last line is best. Not that the rest is bad; just that is the best! ~ Geez.
.
It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?
Obadiah Grey
Thu, 2021-06-03 14:57
It works well.
It works well.
I'm with Mark, you don't need a dash.
Obi.
Arrow
Thu, 2021-06-03 15:47
Thanks all for stopping by
to see my roses. I agree with the removal of the dash. When in doubt, take it out! I also stole some alliteration from Geezer. Much appreciated everyone.
author commentArrow
Wed, 2021-06-16 21:55
Yes, I am indecisive about it . . .
the green makes it more visual, but I was originally going for soft sounds, "s", "ph". Dilemma!
author commentArrow
Wed, 2021-06-16 22:03
Yes, I am indecisive about it . . .
the green makes it more visual, but I was originally going for soft sounds, "s", "ph". Dilemma!
author commentGeezer
Thu, 2021-06-17 08:45
How about...
[filled] instead of green? ~ Geez.
.
It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?
Arrow
Thu, 2021-06-17 15:52
Yes, I like that
stolen and bastardized. Thank you.
author commentGeezer
Thu, 2021-06-17 17:29
Yer welcome...
my pleasure!
It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?
scribbler
Fri, 2021-07-02 08:48
Congrats on winning the contest.
Those cute little lady bugs are monsters to some other insects lol
Arrow
Fri, 2021-07-02 14:17
Kalon
Thank you. Actually, I thought I was quite done with this poem and it was by accident. I was reading a book: Reclaiming Beauty for the Good of the World and came across a discussion of the word and I thought "Perfect!" and popped it in.
author commentMichael Anthony
Sat, 2021-07-03 14:15
Congrats on winning the
Congrats on winning the contest Arrow!
Cheers
Michael Anthony
Geezer
Sun, 2021-07-04 09:15
Congratulations!...
on winning the June contest! ~ Geez.
.
It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?
Arrow
Sun, 2021-07-11 08:08
Thanks for the congratulations
all! I appreciate it.
author comment