Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

If only we still had each other

if only
we still had each other
together we'd lock our beautiful brown eyes
savoring our presence
because time flies

if only
I didn't let go
you'd know
I love you so

if only
time could fly
I'd give its wings
only to look you in the eye
to promise
never to say goodbye

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
i dont really write poems. i wrote this about my breakup with someone i was extremely close to, hoping someone can understand where im coming from
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

to this one. What draws me to these pieces are the terrible angst and somber thoughts, and the realization that life is not always as it [should be], but it is its' own master and needs. Yes, it hurts! Sorry about that!
But, it hurts just as much for us older folks too. I have written off and on for many of my seven decades of life and I am often surprised at some of the work from my youth, as I am some that I have written just a few years ago. We live, we change and we [hopefully grow]. A few years ago, I lost my first wife, [married three times now]. Her and I had split many years ago and had only recently reconciled our friendship. I was surprised an amused that she and I had forgotten and changed our opinions about many things. She departed this life, knowing that we understood much more about each other than we previously thought. My second wife and I; [ evidently I am not that great a learner, are coming to terms with who we were and are now. I have now been married for the third time for more than thirty years and we still are learning about each other. Yes, we will have regrets, and we will be changed forever by others. There are those of us that remember and wish you the best in sorting out your emotions. I think that you will do fine, you feel the need have empathy, we have it right here for you! come and get it! I hope that you keep writing and share more of your experiences of life with us! That, is what writing poetry is all about! Write about the things that fill your life. Life is exciting, even now. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I really love the lines "if only/ time could fly/ I'd give its wings"

"To fly is to fall."

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.