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Icarus and Daedalus

Poor father Daedalus
Was blessed with Icarus,
And what a fool of a son was he.
Such an ingenious inventor
And scientist for a father,
He blamed it on his mother’s genes.

Both caught one day
In a place far away
From the family’s hearth and home,
While Daedalus worked,
Icarus sat and jerked,
Crying on a mossy stone.

But Daedalus did it
To escape prison Crete
He made wings for him and his son.
“We’ll fly from this lair,
We’ll get away from here,
And in doing so we’ll have some fun.”

Icarus wiped his tears
Leaving sad little smears
All over his potato face.
He strapped on the wings,
Those beautiful things,
To win the deadly race.

Daedalus warned: “Do not
Fly high or you’ll be caught
In the rays of Helios’ sun.
The wings will melt
And the deal will be dealt
Between the Fates and Kronos’ son.”

But the foolish boy
Only thought of the toys
And thus doomed himself to die,
For the wings were overdone
In the fire of the sun,
And Icarus fell faster than he could fly.

Let this be a moral to young boys all
Who do not heed their fathers’ warning:
Listen first, then obey
If you truly wish to stay
To see another morning.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 


I loved your story, just a small thing it would be nice to split it up a little to give some breathing space, Later we can go into epics, there is a workshop that is open ended run by Wesley for those long pieces.
This was written with care and thank you for bringing to life the old stories some of us may have forgotten,
Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Thank you for the suggestion. I'll try splitting it into stanzas
Best wishes,

The poet only asks to get his head into the heavens. It is the logician who seeks to get the heavens into his head. And it is his head that splits.~G.K. Chesterton

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