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I Would Kiss You

I would kiss you as stars touch light to light
as waves share a soft drench night
as snows touch pine boughs
as night winds touch long grass
as twilight sounds touch a whisper
as you touch me.... fleetingly
as my lips touch yours in shadows

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Comments

Sigh this is just beautiful I cannot find fault, I rarely use much repetition of words in my poems as sometimes they seem to stunt the poem but you have pulled it off, in my opinion, with style

Bravo

sincerely JC x

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

I'm so pleased that you enjoyed reading it.

My mind's writing cheques my body can't cash.

author comment

you still do inspire me

loved

I'm very pleased to know that my simple words inspire anyone!

Thanks again,

Joe

My mind's writing cheques my body can't cash.

author comment

regards
lovely kissy poem
though shadowy too

loved

beautifully lyrical, I wouldn't change a word
BUT
for future reference

I would kiss you as stars touch light to light
as waves share a soft drench night
as snows (touch) pine boughs--hold onto
as night winds (touch) long grass- winnow
as twilight sounds (touch) a whisper- become
as you touch me.... fleetingly
as my lips (touch) yours in shadows- tremble

the trouble being that on the page the repetition of touch becomes predictable and visually too much seen, recited it would work perfectly because they are very different mediums, and this to me seems a poem ideally suited for live performance
also be wary of words like whisper, shadows, fleetingly, they are used so often in poetry.
but still its very beautiful, a joy really.

the so many touches
you touch
but am I glad the master assures
the obviousity of all
the touch of a poet's heart
in poetry comment is an art
and of loved a part

touch me not
as I wouldn't do, touch a word
of poetry off you
your touch is naturally touchy
and wonderful too

loved

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