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I fell apart but I survived
Does it hurt?
Knowing how you broke me,
How you sent my world crumbling down,
Seeing a strong, confident girl turn into a broken mess.
How do you sleep at night?
Knowing you crushed someone who loves you,
Even after you gave me a million reasons not to,
Knowing that every time you ignore me,
A piece of my heart is chipped away.
How do you go on?
Knowing the pain you caused me,
Knowing someday someone better will come and pick up my broken pieces,
Knowing that I could do so much better than you,
If I could just move on.
Is it easy to forget?
All we had together,
The things we did, do they matter anymore,
Do they mean as much to you as they do to me?
Do you regret the past?
Wish you could undo meeting me?
Even after all you did to me,
I still would have done everything,
Exactly the same.
Did you really love me?
You always told me you did,
But someone who loves you wouldn’t do what you did to me.
If you really loved me,
you wouldn’t have hurt me the way that you did.
How could you?
I didn't think anyone could be capable of that,
Hurting someone so badly.
I was a good friend,
So how come I wasn’t good enough for you?
Is there an end to the tears?
Do your eyes finally dry?
The redness fades.
They say “even the sky eventually stops crying”,
Then how come I can’t?
Does the pain fade?
When the memories are gone,
Can you finally move on?
When seeing me doesn’t hurt you anymore like it does me?
Does the numbness dissipate?
Do you start to care again?
And does your feeling come back?
Can you finally let people in,
And love again?
Is it true?
What they say, “the pain will leave you when you let go”,
Am I still holding on? Is that why it hurts so much?
I want to let go,
But I don’t want to lose you.
Why did you hold on to me?
For as long as you did,
When you knew you would eventually let go,
Why grab my hand if you weren’t going to hold on tight?
Was I ever important?
Did you ever really care?
I would have given you the moon
If that’s what it took to make you happy,
Yet you so easily left me behind.
I wish I could hurt you,
The way you hurt me.
I wish I could say “I don't love you anymore”
But I know, given the chance, I would never take it,
Never say it, because it wouldn’t be true.
I still love you.
Maybe I’m broken, but I won’t be forever,
I’m just waiting to say, “I fell apart but I survived”.
I survived the pain and misery you put me through.
In the end, I won’t need you anymore.
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
Jackweb
Wed, 2022-11-16 15:02
Welcome to neopoet!
A very sad poem! Emotionally touching...The whole lines is full of pain, regret and melancholy. There are complications in a romantic relationships. Falling out of love. A relationship without love is meaningless!
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"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".
~Jackweb
Geezer
Wed, 2022-11-16 15:34
A pretty good poem...
Actually, I think it's really prose
but for the time being we will consider it poetry.
A good story, I knew the ending, but your writing kept me hostage
until the end of it. A really great introspective write.
In the end you said; "Maybe I'm broken, but I won't be forever."
Which says to me, that you are well on the way to healing.
I like the fact that you use punctuation. [Not afraid of the question-mark either]
All in all, title is okay, You go from one thought to the rest, without
stumbles and it flows well from beginning to end. Nice job! ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Lavender
Wed, 2022-11-16 19:59
I Still Love You
Greetings, Eden,
I feel the hurt and sorrow here, on the edge of exasperation. I can appreciate the process of a broken heart healing, and your theme throughout fits that process. I think your title is ok, but the overall feeling I get from the piece is not so much about love, as it is in realizing the pain, and moving on. Letting go.
Welcome to Neopoet, and I look forward to reading more of your work!
Lavender
Yes! to the new title!
L
Rosewood Apothecary
Wed, 2022-11-16 19:30
Welcome to the site
Let me say first that your outward vulnerability makes for a very captivating poem. I like the series of questions that lead to expressions of anger right before you start making affirmations. You will not be broken forever. In fact I don’t think you were broken, just hurt really, really bad.
I disagree with Geezer. I don’t think this is prose. I actually find it to be quite repetitive and I think we want all the stanzas to be five lines and I know where I’d put everything to force the reader into a pattern.
This is an inspiring poem and might I offer some of my favorite writing is about people outgrowing old patterns of behavior. Realizing what’s good for them before might no longer be so.
Welcome to neopoet,
Tim
Geezer
Thu, 2022-11-17 16:25
Actually...
I agree with Rosewood, and I'm glad that I got called out for it. Forgive my impulsive nature.
After reading this again, I went and followed your example and wrote in very similar style.
I don't know where my head was, when I called this prose. ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Candlewitch
Thu, 2022-11-17 10:10
dear Eden,
welcome to Neopoet, it is nice to meet you. your poem takes me back to a really bad breakup a long time ago. I found that the best way to deal with all that pain, anger, and recriminations was to write it all out. there are stages that a person goes through when going through this situation. keep writing and one day soon you will wake up one day and not think of this skug as nothing more than a learning experience.
I hope you feel that Neopoet is a home for your voice! again, welcome!
*Hugs, Cat
*
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