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Hurt, Pain, and Truth - more meter

To think the pain that comes is felt to learn
To stand the pain I bare the truth of hurt
To know the hurt I learn to take its truth
To break the threat of hurt I check my pain
To void the hurt I know before it comes
I learn to track the signs of hurt in time
I break its press before it writes the hurt
I think I know the signs although I’m blind
I look to read the pain of thoughts inside
I lose the train of thought when pain arrives

A waste of time to try to stop the hurt
To start to know is just a step in time
The thought of pain is fact I will not hide
To feel the hurt is just a truth of fact

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
I think I got it.
Editing stage: 
Workshop: 

Comments

Unless someone kindly does it for me.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

for the pain of truth

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE

author comment

I've found it's the easiest and clearest by trial and error.

1. Select Advanced Formatting
2. Only then paste in the poem or it loses formatting
3. Go through and select each stressed syllable and hit Ctrl B to make it bold.
4. Then go through and add the '/'s to separate the Feet

To think the pain that comes is felt to learn
To think/ the pain/ that comes/ is felt/ to learn [Iambic Pentameter!]

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

This line is what I hear and see, but I didn't realize it till you said it.
"This is the perfect "bouncing ball" excercise."
I going after the next meter, now that I got this one with Jess and Wes help.

thanks Mark I appreciate your comment!
Eddie
...

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE

author comment

/To think/ the pain/ that comes/ is felt/ to learn/
To stand/ the pain/ I bare/ the truth/ of hurt/
To know/ the hurt/ I learn/ to take/ its truth/
To break/ the threat/ of hurt/ I check/ my pain/
To void/ the hurt/ I know/ before/ it comes/
I learn/ to track/ the signs/ of hurt/ in time/
I break/ its press/ before/ it writes/ the hurt/
I think/ I know/ the signs/ although/ I’m blind/
I look/ to read/ the pain/ of thoughts/ inside/
I lose/ the train/ of thought/ when pain/ arrives/

A waste/ of time/ to try/ to stop/ the hurt/
To start/ to know/ is just/ a step/ in time/
The thought/ of pain/ is fact/ I will/ not hide/
To feel/ the hurt. is just/ a truth/ of fact/

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Wow, Eddie! You are getting so good at meter! The ease with which you write is eniyable! Great poem, too!

always, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

I thanks you for your generous comment and for parsing the poem by foot. I think we are all learning something useful here. thanks to Professor Jess. hahaha! inside Joke to Jess.

Eddie

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE

author comment

As far as I can tell, Cat broke this down perfectly. All seems to me to be iambic pentameter (which of course reads a bit forced here and there......hardly possible Not to seem that way in a write of any length when maintaining same foot count) Very good sample for the shop................stan

I thank you, but forced it was not. It is what's inside of me concerning private issue. everything I write in this shop is about me it makes it easier than trying to make-up a poem. i write in this shop what i know, the darkness that lives inside. like when I first came here I only wrote dark poetry. now i've learn the light but it for me harder to create something that's not there. I march on in the light. for now I will write in the dark

But this is iambic pentameter

Eddie

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE

author comment

you use effective repetition to write a solemn truth.

I like this poem very much, meter perfect.

Sometimes simple statements of fact make for the best poetry.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

thank you very much, your words are appreciated, coming from a leader an mendor of mine in this workshop.

Eddie
...

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE

author comment
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