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The Heart Of Wales

In the south of Wales, now don’t forget,
December to February
Is normally wet.

Dryslwyn castle is whispered with snow,
while the serpentine Towy
meanders below.

Where once there rode the marauding horde
of Rhys son of Maredudd
and his bloody sword.

‘tween March and May the sun comes out,
and the waters are teeming
with salmon and trout.

Paxton’s folly, stands silent and still;
its magnificent stature
atop a high hill.

A Gothic building, built by Pepys,
in memory of Nelson,
who in the grave sleeps.

From June to August leaden clouds froth
and the heavens foam squally
with a bilious broth.

Old oak trees shelter sodden wet sheep,
while the gorges are flooded
and rivers brawl deep.

Waterfall Woods drips emerald green,
where the lichen blooms flourish
and kingfishers preen.

The sky is fickle in September
blowing this way then that way
in to November.

King Arthur’s stone, near the Gower shore,
has stood as a monument
since the days of yore.

This is the land where history sings,
of legendary dragons
and ancient gold rings.

A land full of magical tales
as preserved by the valleys
and people of Wales.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
A double dd in Welsh = th Rhys ap Maredudd = Rhys "son of" Maredudd ( Meridith )
Editing stage: 

Comments

This is a beautiful poem once you find it's rhythm, took me a few attempts but really worth the effort. I tried to write a different ending but i doubt if i'll better what you have written. I will give it some thought, i will certainly come back to read this poem again.. Love Roscoe

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

Kind of you to come by to read and comment - I have made some changes - You made my day with your lovely comment - it gave me the boost I needed to carry on working on it. Soo a big thank you from me!!

I hope you and yours have a fantastic holiday with lots of love and happiness!

Keep safe

Love Mand xxxxxxx

author comment

I've always wanted to visit England and see its many wonders, and your poem makes me wish it all the more! Wales must be a marvelous place for you to describe it so lovingly! I thoroughly enjoyed reading this!

Wales is beautiful, it's history is ancient and colourful and the people ( for the most part ) are friendly, hospitable and interested in people of other cultures. There are approximately 160 castles in Wales - each with a story to tell. ( Scotland has approx. 2,000 castles and England has around 1,500 ), so there would be a lot to explore if you were to visit, with a view to learning about history. ( You - I'm sure would receive a warm welcome ).

Glad you liked it - and soo pleased that you came by to read and comment. Great encouragement.

Keep safe

Love Mand xxxxx

author comment

It's a task to write about homeland without it being trite isn't it? But you have dne well with it.
Phraes which really stand out to me :whispered with snow (much better than powdered), rivers brawl deep. But there's one that I think needs a bit of work : Heavens foam squalid.
Now some minor alternatives you can think about
stanza 4 try with either spotted or sparkling sea trout
stanza10 try on into November
stanza 12 try mythical instead of legendary...don't know why lol
Ending? hmmm...
A land saturated with magical tales
as preserved by the valleys
and people of Wales.

You know I seldom spend this much time on a poem I don't already like and you are free to blow off any or all alternatives.......stan

Soo good to see you and so pleased to have your observation, input and advice. I will look over your suggestions forthwith and implement some changes.

In the meantime I hope you and yours have a fantastic holiday, with lot's of family time and happiness.

Keep safe

Love Mand xxxxxxxxx

author comment

Write about my country you see,
Digit has put paid to me
going very far he has desecrated mostly all
the beauty spots we have loved so long.
From the hills of Wales to the Glastonbury show.
London didn't escape his killing ways you know.
But this piece you have shown that all is not lost
A beauty stays clean no matter the cost.
I love those rain washed hills and valley walls.
They capture your soul as did your write,
To charm my memory tonight..
Thank you young lady of the valley,
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Me too! I hear that North Wales is even more beautiful - rugged with mountains and gushing waterfalls. Son has travelled into the isolated hills and swum in crystal clear lagoons - fantastic!

Does digit still live? I suspect he does and will once again be up to his old tricks! ehhh

Thanks again young Ian - nice to see you. Love to all - Cheers!

Love Mand xxxxxxxxxxx

author comment

My valleys and hills and mountains bare.
Tell stories of love spoons and things to share
Yet hidden deep is a trust of your fellow man
Where mines are carved by many a hand

Listen good to those words singing in your heart
They are of the Spirit that I wish we could impart.
Lost tears for all those times gone by
There valleys will live again, you'll hear them sigh

Come home to my beauty that only a spirit can see
it will be there for our eternity if we only believe.
I shall soon be saying goodbye to all
though I may still have to live many a fall

One day in the quiet of the evenings swell
you will hear my voice in your ear then you can tell
Of a person you once met on a poetry site,
That told you of what would claim him, a gentle light.

His guide will tell him when it is time to go
so listen to the sighing breeze, singing birds just so
There in the windswept trees so far above
He will sing a song of the wonderful life we love.

where he lived, loved and grew, feeling without fear.
In spirit throughout the years, so smile, no more tears.
Just a few words to fill the valley's of the mind..
Yours Ian .T, to a friend of mine

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Your love for Wales and the people shines through! I'm sure your words will live on - and long after we are gone your song will be heard in the windswept trees - carried along by the breeze into the hills and valleys of Wales. And maybe a love spoon will be carved in your honour.

I loved the deep feeling in this poem - bought a tear to my eye!

Keep safe

Love Mand xxxxx

author comment

Hi Ian, I couldn't agree more on what Mand has commented below. Such words can be inspired through the love of the land one loves and relates to...it is a pleasure to read it...thanks for sharing this..

raj (sublime_ocean)

exception
but I feel poetry should be limited
to lines 15 or 20
so that the never ending Q
of unread ones
gets its due

loved

I hope you have a wonderful holiday, with plenty of love an cheer. Sorry I'm not around much - I don't manage to log on very often for various reasons.

Thanks for coming by to read and comment - much appreciated. Keep safe. Hope to see you soon.

Love Mand xxxxx

author comment

I am ever so happy
when you come around
you have been sound
with the ante Neopoet's guy
dumbfound

loved

Did you have pen and paper when you scripted this beautiful piece? Or did you have a brush, easel and canvas when you painted this beautiful landscape of Wales. I suggest you submit this to the Tourist Department of Wales, if there is one. I am not joking Mand, I truly believe this can be a wonderful promo for the tourists. Thanks for the free all seasons ride.

If memory serves me right, there used to be a "Mark as favorite" option here before, I searched for it but couldn't find it now

raj (sublime_ocean)

Can you see me blushing? Thanks Raj - Your comment is truly appreciated. I feel honoured that you feel this poem worthy of being a favourite - I truly do.

Thank you once again - I hope you have a wonderful, happy and prosperous new year.

Keep safe

Love Mand xxxx

author comment

I meant every word in my comment without any flattery.. If it made you blush, it's good to carry it in the New Year...

Wishing You and Your Beloveds A Very Happy, Healthy, Peaceful, Bright & Prosperous New Year. Look forward to read more of your posts too..Be well...

raj (sublime_ocean)

:) Thanks Raj - looking forward to reading your poetry too!!

Love to you.

Mand xxxxx

author comment

After reading the last few words you have three options, add new comment, nominate this poem and bookmark this :)
best regards

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Follow me
www.instgram.com/rularules1

Thanks Rula but where are the options to book mark or nominate a poem is what I have been looking out for. The closest I cam to finding that was in the drop down Menu under "Tools" where there is a tab "Premium Bookmark"..I don't know what's that

raj (sublime_ocean)

direct after the poem and before the commets

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Follow me
www.instgram.com/rularules1

Thanks a lot Rula, appreciate your help

raj (sublime_ocean)

I am so sorry I missed this one until now its a wonderful piece I thoroughly enjoyed the read, I have to say I read your profile page tonight and I noticed you said in your spiel that you were doing something you weren't good at ie; poetry

I have to totally disagree not all great poets were highly educated people some of them came from nothing you have a wonderful way with words don't ever stop writing you have the gift, I believe your best poems are yet to come

much love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

Soo nice to see you! I hope it's not to hot over there! I'm glad you enjoyed this one ( it was helped along by some astute observations and suggestions ). Thank you for your lovely comments and encouragement! Sometimes I feel a little out of my depth. ( if someone were to question me on what a verb, noun, adjective etc is I think I'd be a little lost ). I just write what comes out of my head and hope for the best! But I'm learning a lot on Neo, thanks to the workshops and comments I so kindly receive.

I hope your surgery and house move go well! Moving can be a stressful time but you have surgery to cope with as well!

Thanks once again thanks for your kind words and encouragement.

Love Mand xxxxxxxx

author comment

Boroda Mand, I love Wales, so glad I came to visit you there, and know what you are describing, at least some of it! Still dream myself back there up at the old ruins. well written poem too.

Love Ann

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

You took pictures of Dryslwyn castle when you came! and you viewed the Towy and Paxton tower - it was a lovely day walking up to the castle, past the sheep. Good memories indeed.

LOve Mand xxxxx

author comment
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