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Heart Starter

I admired him from afar,
watching
through a window
of time

our first contact
bled with the intenseness
of a crash,
admiration
was thrown and seeds
of contempt grew

Days went by
side looks stared
into the target,
but disdain and ire
waned to nothing
but sparks of ego

the second introduction,
it bound by the rules
of Utopian society,
a new conversation
of light and song
of love gone wrong

Started.

But
communication
ceased, memory faded
touch was lost,
but again, today
he said "Hello"
and my heart
now thumps.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

A good write on situations that happens to a lot of us.
Residual feelings flicker as a candle in the void of space.
Take care young lady, just smile and walk on..
Yours as always Ian & Friends xx

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I think I started this poem about six months ago I found it the other night and decided to finish it, I think a lot of people have feelings like this but never act on them for whatever reason. I had impetus to finish this one maybe showing what could be or maybe ? ;)

much love always JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

An enjoyable read and I thought the title really fits your "little tale."
I've played a little with the lination of some verses, see if you like any or discard it altogether dear.

our first contact
bled with the intenseness
of a crash,

admiration was thrown
and seeds of contempt grew

Days went by[,]
side looks stared
into the target,
but disdain and ire
waned to nothing
but sparks of ego

the second introduction,
it bound by the rules
of Utopian society,
a new conversation
of light and song
of love gone wrong
[s]Started.

But [I'd drop this"but"]
communication ceased,
memory faded
touch was lost,
but
again, today
he said "Hello"
and my heart
now thumps.[I'd say "now is thumping, or "my heart thumps"]

Please know I really loved this as it tells much about your little heart.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Follow me
www.instgram.com/rularules1

I am very happy you liked this one I plan to edit it over the next few days I have a week with not much to do so my plan is to work on some poems and edit a lot that have gone by the wayside in the craziness of things, thanks for your kind pointers I will take them all into consideration when I do an edit and I will be doing one soon :)

thanks for the visit and your thoughts they are always appreciated

love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment
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