Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Grin and Burn in Solidarity

We carry our ideals in our ever expanding bellies,
wobbling around with like-mind friends and rellies,
oh where is youth that promised us space views?
Gone in the vacuity of faux Fox News.

The promise we had of bright new worlds,
buried in lies of corporate turds.
Hope lies yet in the power of solidarity,
despite being disenfranchised by global disparities.

Our hope lies in more than the death of corporate personhood,
We each have the power of the common good,
all in the solidarity of the here and now,
not the lie of a post-mortem vow.

Most of all what needs shredding, burning with a grin
is the stinking vile concept of original sin.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
Composed in 5 minutes flat for a cousin who asked what's wrong with the world.
Editing stage: 

Comments

Bloody Hell, I loved it, I am under the weather tonight and I was just reading before bed but I will be back tomorrow night to see if I cant offer anything, I just wanted to let you know I was here.

5mins ? shaking my head ...just imagine...

Most of all what needs shredding in a a burning bin
is the stinking vile concept of original sin.

you have an extra "a" in the second last line btw just noticed it...

Jayne x

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

Well spotted on the 'a', ta.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

author comment

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

author comment

A nice eye opener message about what's happening around the world and to not get carried away by the false sugar coated promises and lies meted out by the corporates and if I may add the politicians too...nice read...

Too quiet here being past midnight here. I will listen to your read tomorrow..

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

I'm afraid it's more than sugar-coated promises. It is life, death, the false promises of death and the undermining of the human spirit. Perhaps my irresistable injections of humour dilute the message.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

author comment

On reading it again and your explanation I am able to connect with what you meant. Thanks for elaborating.

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

are a one helluva poet! i love everything about it! then again, you are one of the mentors, so that is to be expected...;O)

Love
Alid

I wish my ability to help others matched my own abilities as a poet. I just happen to be educated in the subject.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.