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Godless...

Although I'm godless, I'm not bad
but some would think it so
I would say, that I think it’s sad
I’d say that you don’t know

I don’t kill, because you’re not me
I don’t shame, nor do I shun
In America, we all are free
I've no need to kill God’s son

Mother Mary and saints galore
There’s miracles everywhere
Original sin and lots, lots more
And proselytizers share

Buddha, Mohammad, Sister Jenny
Catholics, Baptists too
I’d name them all, there’s so many
But, I don’t want to bore you

So, keep your gods, I’ll do without
You worship and I won’t
I know life’s rules, what it’s about
You need a god, I don’t

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

Hot topic and with a great message.
I think the title gives too much away,
I'd probably leave it at "godless" but
that's me.
You do know that to many "believers"
the "non-believers" are the enemy?
So this may spark emotional responses,
which is good.

totally enjoyed your poem

I do believe you are right. I will take that suggestion. Thank you.
I know that this might spark some fires, but I'm ready to take the heat.
I took the heat to defend someone that I thought was being bullied because of their religion, so I figure that I can take the heat from being Godless! Thanks for the warning though! ~ Gee.
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author comment

Hello, G. Its a clever piece that a lot of folk (I'm guessing) can relate with. Not too sure about enjoying it though!
Strange how the Godists claim the high ground in morality,,, innit.

Yours, agnostically. Obi.

I wanted to show the other side of the coin. I wanted to say that this is what our forefathers had in mind when they started this country, but I don't believe that is true either. They spoke out of both sides of their mouths. They believed that one should believe in a God, just not the one that they were being forced to believe in. They also said that they believed that all men are created equal, but didn't believe that people of different skin color were men and were little more than animals. Fortunately, the people took it a step further and finally got these people of different color their rights and now it is time for us to take it the rest of the way; to not having to believe in a god at all. Just because we don't, it doesn't make us bad people. ~ Geezer.
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I think this your piece of writing should be preached to so many Nigerians of today who believe that if you are not a Christian then you already gone astray
love the piece, nice one

always remember to make a critique of other poems
using the hoe is not madness for nothing

taught to all people, the world over. Just because someone doesn't believe the way that others do, it doesn't make them bad people. What makes bad people, is killing others and treating them badly for not believing the way that they do. Let us remember that the Bible and the Koran and all the other books of religion were written by men! Men who had their own agendas, who wrote what they believed should be. I never saw any text that was written in flames, in stone or seared into someone's forehead by a god. How could a god that is supposed to be benevolent and loving, exhort his followers to kill all those that do not believe as they do? Thank you for your support. ~ Geezer.
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author comment

this is one of the works that I really appreciate, for me, i always blem on those who talk against unbelievers for it is he who gives life has the right to judge.

I'm glad that you have read and understood what I am trying to say! ~ Geezer

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Gee you have balanced out your verses smartly in a way that you are able to express your opinion without offending any reader who is a believer. I liked it...

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

of course I agree with you. (I think you are correct and brave to post it. I have a poem published in the last American Atheist magazine which if you like I can send in private message, I wouldn't t want here to discuss your poem with my poem.)
I guess all i can say about your poem is it is direct, to the point, easy and fun to read. But I think the subject is so big you might consider digging a little deeper. how you are able to cope with life without a god, why you don't need a god to make you a good person...Otherwise the poem becomes a bit like propaganda, which I do not use the word in the pejorative sense. I do it commonly too. Perhaps the poem could use a touch of philosophy..of which there is quite abundant choices..my latest favorite is Hume. I love this one " I'm absolutely sure that there is no god, and that Mary is it's mother." That is brilliant. That god is the human imagination...

After the engaging debate about the recent praise the lord poem, I am glad you posted.

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

I'll not take the bait and argue religion with you because I think religion or lack of it is personal. But I think I see a few spots where this poem might be improved and maybe even relate its message better . So here's your poem with a few changes you might consider. :
Although godless, I'm not bad
But some would label me so
I’d say that, I think it’s sad
I’d say that you can't know

I'd not kill, because you’re not me
I don’t shame, nor do I shun
In America, we all are free
I have no need to kill God’s son

Mary, Theresa, and saints galore
There’s miracles everywhere
Original sin and whole lots more
And proselytizers there to share

Buddha, Mohammad, Sister Jenny
Catholics, Baptists, Hindus too
I’d name them all, but there’s so many
I'd prefer to not bore you

So, keep your gods, I’ll do without
You can worship while I won’t
I know life’s rules, what it’s about
You might need your god, I don’t

Just a few ideas that rattled out of my empty noggin lol

I'll take these suggestions into consideration. There are a few from Eumolpus too, that bear looking at. Give me a little time to regard them and I'll decide which and what to use. Thanks.~ Gee.
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author comment

use them all or use none of them. After all this is Your poem and my suggestions are only that......stan

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