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The Game

The art to love
life longevity
is to play
the game

Know the rules
then break some
not all
is so draining

but I've played
with ancient

Rhodes town
Mandraki harbour
they beat me

I didn't know

But the game
unfolded like
a Rubic's cube

Dark shiny pebbles
burning into
my celtic reserve

tracking my every
the ouzo left
greasy white

The pebbles
grew darker
with concentration
mine fluttered

The drachma pile
waxed and waned
mostly waned
from my side

I was distracted by
younger pebbles
the apprentice gods
chewing the fat
with their
municipal fraternity

The Adonis that
sat next to his uncle
lifted the well trailed
the gossamer imprint
pressed to my lips

focus ebbed away
the old pebbles
the game plan

'beware greeks bearing gifts'

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 


I enjoyed this one from start to finish. I don't don't often do freeform poetry myself, but I can appreciate it. This is an excellent example to me. The little punch-line at the end is typical of something I might add if I had written a similar piece. Nice! ~ Geezer

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thanks for your comments, I'm glad you appreciated the punchline, it came to me about halfway through the writing of the piece...cliched, I know, but it seemed to fit! I've decided freeform is my milieu, so i'm trying to produce the best form of it I can with as many different themes as I can...They are all a work in progress!

Ells x

author comment

Glad it gave a chortle...lovely word, can imagine you doing, fag-seasoned tones! As I said to Geezer, the punch-line is a bit cliched, but it seemed to fit well...and I did actually do this when I was a student... a beautiful Adonis called Constantine Spanoudis actually drank from my glass. After all these years can remember him in every detail. Still rubbish at Backgammon!

Mrs C x

author comment

Fabius cunctator a general in the war sent out to distract
Thomas mans death in Venice the beautiful boy distracting the old man,
And in your case I can even see the young Adonis

Hi Frenchf, He was so handsome...left an imprint, dark curly hair, dark liquid pools of eyes, perfect olive skin, musculature, 'perfect' man. Spent 20 odd years using that as a model, consequently 20 years of misery! (However, have just recently married a man that is curly-haired, dark eyed, handsome enough to be my perfection!)

Ells :)

author comment

As you have at last achieved your goal
Well done xxxx

I really liked this one I felt like I was sitting there watching the game, my favourite lines

The Adonis that
sat next to his uncle
lifted the well trailed
the gossamer imprint
pressed to my lips

I love that ending its just wonderful

love Jayne-Chloe xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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