Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Fake Feelings
Have you ever thought of a tear falling to the ground, have you thought of a world without any warmth, touch, or feeling? I’m sure many people have but the truth is nobody converses with another human soul, in recent days, times, centuries people have never experienced feeling unless they are hurt because nobody is ever truly joyful they are too fake. The tears you feel when you cry is one of the only human things on this planet we call Earth. I have always wondered what lives beyond this planet… Maybe there are creatures that truthfully have feelings besides pain, do they even have feelings? We probably will never know due to man’s lack of mind, we are all too caught up in fake feelings that no one knows what the root of feelings true origin is just that we are human and Eve shined a spotlight on the truth of man when she took the fruit from the forbidden tree.
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage:
Contest:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Eumolpus
Mon, 2019-11-11 14:22
You have written a nice speech
And content aside, I don’t see it as a poem. Poetry is about images, metaphor, inner music, sound, charged words and all the rest. There are many forms of communication with words. Poetry needs boundaries. If we call everything written a poem then it’s all fake news . Poetry is about imagination and poetic truth and moves us differently than common speech. The more you read of it, the more you will understand it.
Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings
c lynn brooks
Wed, 2019-11-13 15:28
Stanzas
help immensely when reading a poem
may I edit a bit see how you feel about this
Have you ever thought about
a tear falling to the ground(right here is a good start)
or a world without using our natural senses( my little addition)
I am sure you have
but des anyone convey this feeling(again my addition)
only the tears we cry
are the true humanity left
on this plane we call earth
we will never know as mankind has become a shadow of itself
Eve cast a spotlight over man
when she took the forbidden fruit
exposing the truth f all mankind
I know I have taken a lot of liberties but I saw substance here and a voice use it disgard it whatever you wish as it s only a suggestion
Chrys
check out our chat room open to all 24/7
Edna Sweetlove
Sun, 2019-11-17 19:59
Not a poem.
Not a poem. Not even verse. This is what we call "prose".
xxx
Edna
Poet(ess) to the Stars