Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Eating Evil...

Sleet, like grains of sand
Abraze his face and tear his skin
The chill air that they ride on
is a wind from Hell...

Now that he has risen
from his self-imposed exile
he feels that it is time
to do what's been a while

He stretches mind and body
looks around and grins
He thinks that there are plenty
of tyrants, who have sins

Killer rose and called Anubis
"Time to weigh some hearts"
"I think that we are needed
"Evils off the charts!"

The coal-black dog with blood-red eyes
yawned and stretched out too
His eyes burned with savage hunger
he loved his master's view

"Let's go out into the world
stop the madness of these days"
Killer whets his blade of justice
he's going to make "them" pay

There will be plenty retribution
piles of rotten meat
for the evil of this world
is all that they can eat

"Let's get ourselves some tickets
on a European plane
We're going to fight the Russians
I like them, those Ukraine!"

They do not care about the odds
be it ten to one or twenty
I'm thinking we'll be welcome
We will kill them Russians, plenty!

Putin isn't smart
like Teflon Donny says
he's fanned a raging fire
and threw upon it, gas

When we've had our fill of them
Let's visit North Korea
Chop up Kim Duk Un
later baby, see ya!

Who else needs a little trimming?
Show your evil now
We've got plenty of hurt for you
We will make you chow!

Not Ciao, like the Italians say
but a barbecue roasted well
and your soul will be sent on down
to the fiery depths of Hell!

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

"of grains of sand" is the first "of" necessary? it feels a little rough. my favorite lines are:

Killer rose and called Anubis
"Time to weigh some hearts"
"I think that we are needed
"Evil's off the charts!"

and the last four lines of the poem make a fine finish, great work!

*hugs, Cat
ever eddy

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

pointing out that typo and your wonderful comments of the exploits of Killer and Anubis! Yeah, they are looking for a flight to Moscow at the moment. Hope they get there and take out that rotten Putin. Sir Gee is staying home on this mission, he thinks that he can do some good in helping with charity drives and such for the Ukrainians. ~ Hugs from us both. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

You make it so easy Geezer with the free flowing and rhyme scheme. I enjoyed the poem. Best of today's lot.

Rhyme and meter come pretty easy to me, something I just have a talent for, I guess.
Do you have like a nickname or a short version of your name? You must admit, your name is quite a mouthful. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Anyi is a short version of my name Geezer.

it will make replying to your comments and such so much easier. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

You make it so easy Geezer with the free flowing and rhyme scheme. I enjoyed the poem. Best of today's lot.

I agree with him above. You make it look easy. I thoroughly enjoyed your poem. I loved the dark attire it wears. Thanks for sharing.

Love and light. Namaste.

said before, Rhyme and meter come pretty easy to me. I think that if you write rhyme, and say it out loud, you see where the
stumbles are and when you find them. Sometimes it's as easy as using another word, sometimes you have to switch the line around, and other times, rewrite the line using the same word. I enjoy puzzling it out. Thank you for enjoying Killer and Anubis'
little adventure. If you like the darkness, you might find other Killer poems. Just go to my profile [Geezer] and you will find them. Thanks again, ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

to the (fiery) depths of Hell?

ever, eddy

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

that does it! Thanks much, it needed that little touch to make the meter. ~ Hugs Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Really like the pace and tone of this piece and particularly liked the opening stanzas.
A couple of the rhymes sounded a bit forced to my ear, if I'm honest though.. and surely the French don't say Ciao, that's Italian….was that intentional?
Hope you don't mind me saying that... hell, what do I know!
Regards,
klundera

Hi,
Korea/see ya and now/chow seemed like you were forcing a rhyme in, I felt, and 'the fiery depths of Hell!' is a nice, but rather well worn ,phrase.
I always had it drummed into me that poetry doesn't HAVE to rhyme, and indeed that making it do so for the. sake of getting it in can often diminish the impact of a poem, although not always of course.

and no, I don't mind you saying that! LoL. I forgot that Killer doesn't speak French or Italian. I'll change it! ~ Geezer.
.
I'm interested to see where you think the rhyme seems forced?

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

did you see that you have fifty reads on this poem? Congratulations!!!

ever, eddy

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

I didn't notice! I guess when you're having fun, you just don't notice stuff like that. Thanks for the congrats! ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.