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Drifting (Primal poetry Part One new piece)

Drifting

I will ask you to join me for a walk,
There is a high place that I know
We can meet there on a grassy knoll
Overlooking the quiet sea below.

Underfoot the grasses give way to chalk
As down we go no need to talk
Here the cliff side is trodden down
Many come here from busy towns

Leave all those things behind
Here the sand will capture your mind
Soft surface in waves blown by the breeze
Follow each movement draws you on

Listen now you can hear the sweet song
Of oceans breath on things we long
A sound yet a feeling from deep inside
Drawn to you on the drifting tide.

Sit a while, take it all in, let no outside in.
Drift with the edge of the oceans kiss.
Just feel the energy, and the bliss
As each wave kisses the shore

Build yourself a beach anew
Bring past friends here to talk with you
Drift on to the healing of being within
The universe is held inside your being

Walk quietly as you build a place for you
Soft sands rippling waves something new
Feel the joy of a child as they play here
The joy vibrate for those that hear.

I will leave you here so that you can be
Within your own peace or reality
Here nothing can touch the one you are
Just whisper my name I am not so far..

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
Jess asked for a new piece just a moment ago, so 15 minutes I have journeyed so..
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Comments

the grassy knolls I say favorite spot to walk

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

So lovely to see you here, I hope that you are well.
This piece was an extra that Jess asked for I will have to do part two as soon as I can find the space lol. Take care young lady and do let me know how you are, I will look into the other site you mentioned but at the moment I am writing on about five sites plus my own lol See you later
Yours as always Ian xx

Words can build a nation

author comment

I'm doing much better as I heal my self spiritually and physically

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

Great to hear that you are doing better now and taking control of your own healing and well being it is the best thing to do. One thing about that please don't use your own energy as out there is the universe and it has infinite energy.. It matters not how you connect with it just believe it is there.
Many peoples all across the Earth plain have different ways of connecting with this energy but as long as you believe it is there.. You take care of yourself and know that we all walk these pathways where the end place is of Unconditional love and freedom, Yours as always Ian xx

Words can build a nation

author comment

i very in-tune to the universe and its energy is awesome

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

Yes, it is hard to surrender and release long practised paths but you are doing it.
Thank you for your trust in me in following this strange old way.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

The second person. You are acting as a guide rather than surrendering and reporting.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Just trying to walk with the person that is reading.
And I was doing so well,
Yours Ian ..

Words can build a nation

author comment

No, you are doing so well. It was me that failed to appreciate that you were sharing the experience.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

...

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

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