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double grumble

grumblers two
can't still believe
it's a metre long...
you work in depth
in knots
all know
but metre perhaps
is a bit too long ...

reduce your weight...
I did too
ran a mile
then collapsed
as just as well
with the laden weight
of bag of vegetables

so why reduce weight
I say
make do
your better half will still love you
slow be it never mind
life's always been a fast grind...
never mind

the days ahead
better slow
than be dead.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 


OK Loved, now I at least understand your context. Losing weight is a personal challenge and can only be accomplished if you believe in yourself and the "rightness" of the exercise and diet. I know, I lost 80 pounds in to years. Others caenciurage but only you can make it work successfully.



My mind's writing cheques my body can't cash.

which in all humans
does enter
then i visualize
compose poetry

but yes
I also now need to weigh down
else one day
I'll look a clown ...

which I now mostly do
to humour guys
like you

so I must thank you too!!!!


author comment

Unless people don't overindulge through mostly boredom, then I think that they will become their natural weight.
What was the fist Stanza all about ??? is that your waist measurement ??
Once again you have used a comment as a separate poem, you see I still read all the poems and the comments lol, Yours Ian.T
PS:- have just found the first Stanza as a comment to Joe's poem about the city Yin and Yang (Now Now Naughty, you trying to trip me up)

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

always as you can
Ian my poetic man,


author comment
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