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does she know

she thinks she knows
but she knows not
that she does not know
I know

It hurts deep within,
the dagger is stuck
now I don't know
that she does not know
the dagger I will pull out or not

ask her if she knows,
she will smile and say
time will tell
wait for that day

but she knows
she has killed my nerves
now no more love she deserves
but knows not what will happen next

like a dog
now she will run
from there to here
but
no one will her voice hear
she knows this not
yet my dear
my life is no more for her
to endear

now she must know
tell me yes or no

may be it was just a stroke
but the gong did bang

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

no one has yet commented on the poem. It is an interesting set of related thoughts with a strong conclusion. The first verse is particularly well put. One little thought to consider; a poem like this would really benefit from a clear grammatical presentation.

Keith Logan
the happy chappy
https://www.neopoet.com/community-guidelines

grateful to you shall
edit when some more hammer me
grammatically
maybe

author comment

It seems to have an agenda but I don't know what.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

betrayal
by one loved
by some one
imagery
jess
you pass my way
much less

no need for me
to guess

author comment

Given time and inclination constraints I have made the choice to focus on newcomers.

Perhaps I've gone too far in that direction and in the process deserted old friends.

I will endeavour to redress the situation,

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

redress
and
make others confess
what they ought to profess
as does
Jess

you have given me
the spice of poetic life

now i don't silly ones compose
as in you alone confidence
i repose
i suppose

without your teaching me
could i have stood my way
my poetry now has legs
which carry it all the way

the credit goes to not divinity
but mainly to you jess
i must openly confess
hope youngsters will read this
what i deem to profess
few are like you jess

author comment
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