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DO NOT DISTURB -update

Submitted by Geremia on Fri, 2013-04-05 04:26

DO NOT DISTURB

It has become a quiet
world
not much spoken
little heard
and I forbear the day
with the silence terror brings,

I am a puppet on a broken string
an incongruous human machine.
I’ve lost control.
I’ve lost my hold
on pride and dignity
and it seems to me
I’ve lost myself
in my own insanity

Useless are the words
the Mind seeks
Painful are the words
the Soul speaks.
Never to be heard
are the whisperings
that silence brings.

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Ian.T

Fri, 2013-04-05 09:33

Ian.T's picture
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You are not in the silence, I hear you shouting in the quiet of the day, your soul is always busy learning and sometimes waiting for you to catch up.
Take care of you Joe, we have lots to do,
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Geremia

Fri, 2013-04-05 10:12

Geremia's picture

nothing is over until it's over.

author comment

loved

Fri, 2013-04-05 13:12

loved's picture

in silence stay
never at others mercy stay

you are a brave one
till your last day
till then silently
pray or play

with words as you are
wont to

loved

Geremia

Sat, 2013-04-06 08:35

Geremia's picture

It's not bravery, my friend. It is that there is no other way.

joe

.

author comment

Seren

Sat, 2013-04-06 08:06

Seren's picture

I really loved your poem I cannot offer anything in the way of crit, that ending is awesome

Never to be heard
are the whisperings
that silence brings.

I love the ending bravo

love your Jayne-Chloe xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

Geremia

Sat, 2013-04-06 08:40

Geremia's picture

Thank you, my Jane. The "whisperings" are getting louder.

love from your Joe

Never could I have ever imagined......

author comment

Frenchf

Sat, 2013-04-06 14:28

And that was stimulated by your poem wondering hat it would be like to be lying in my coffin six foot underground. Sorry that you produced such gloomy thoughts by your nice write.

Geremia

Sat, 2013-04-06 15:47

Geremia's picture

these dying eyes see clearly now
the nature of all living things
I mourn the years gone quickly by
and hold them safe
from Time's forgetfullness
in Memory' keep

author comment
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