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Dear John

Dear John, I want to tell the truth, about my hidden story,
Throughout our marriage, I have always voted Tory.
I’m sorry, if you’re upset, but I had to hide the fact,
Does my confession annul our marriage contract?

I know I said I loved you, and your socialist ideas,
And if you ever left me, I’d cry rivers with my tears.
Alas, I have to put me first, as we Tory voters speak,
I’m tired of your voice, your proletariat critique.

Perhaps if you were more like me, secretive and cruel,
We’d be happy ever after and you wouldn’t look a fool?
Suppose it’s over now, you’ll leave in such a hurry,
I have to think this is right, because John, I’m not sorry.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
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Comments

The below is a computer generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Dear John" presents a unique perspective on political differences within a marriage. The use of a personal letter format creates a sense of intimacy and vulnerability, adding to the impact of the confession. The rhyme scheme and consistent meter add a pleasing musicality to the poem, enhancing its readability.

However, the poem's message is disturbing. The speaker's admission of concealing their political beliefs from their partner is troubling, especially in the context of a committed relationship. The suggestion that the speaker's partner should be more like them, "secretive and cruel," is concerning and undermines the idea of mutual respect and compromise in a relationship.

One suggested line edit could be to remove the line "Suppose it’s over now, you’ll leave in such a hurry," as it feels abrupt and lacks the emotional depth needed to address the impact of such a confession on a relationship.

Overall, while the poem is well-crafted, its message raises important questions about the nature of honesty and respect in a relationship.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Come on Bot, it's a comedy poem. Ok, it may not be funny to some NeoPoet members but, I do try :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

author comment

it was hilarious! We must remember as the AI tells us, that it does not have human emotions, and it does not understand
sarcasm for sure! I think that you have written about something that may be more prevalent than is thought amongst life- partners and friends. While it is commonly thought that people are so committed to political parties and such, that they cannot keep from espousing their beliefs, I know some people that avoid the subject altogether. It is most likely that there a certain number that deliberately hide their feelings on that score, going so far as to lie about it. Anything for love, love. You gave me a smile and I cannot see much in the way to improve. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thanks Geezer. I wrote it for a laugh really but over here with the Brexit vote, the effect on some members of families has been particularly devisive, with people refusing to speak to each other about the way they voted or consider that they were manipulated by our own government.

It will be interesting to see what a new government brings as the Tories are guaranteed to lose the next election. They have turned our parliament into a hive of crime and our country into a laughing stock. It's sad, but when the Tories fall, it will be years before they get another chance.

Thank you again for your comments, I'm glad I made you smile, that Bot doesn't know how to take a joke for sure. Ruby :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

author comment

I found myself smiling. I reckon that differing politic do doom some marriages though

Thanks Scribbler for your comments, I'm glad I made you smile. Ruby :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

author comment

Thanks Maximus, I'll take a look and see if I can reword those two sentences. I appreciate your input and suggestions. Ruby :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

author comment

Has no sense of humor when it comes to Dear John. It had nothing nice to say about mine and said as much, it wouldn't even leave critique it disliked mine so much. I thought this was well written and saw the humor. For something that isn't supposed to have feelings. Dear John seems to be a touchy subject for AI. Maybe he has received a letter?

~RoseBlack~

The Bot, lacks any sense of satire, it lacks the talent of a poet, understanding and judges only on prescribed themes and terms it has learned. I don't know if it will get any better, but if it does, I can't see how it will overcome the human brain in our capacity to see and imply things that it can't. And who invented a Bot that doesn't understand sarcasm? First first fatal mistake. Ruby :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

author comment

I see the satire in the poem. In some ways, it reminds me of some of the "Saturday Night Live" skits from years ago. But it also reminds me of the friendships and family ties that I've seen broken due to the hyperpartisan atmosphere this country has been hurtling towards. A co-worker refers to his wife's brother as his "idiot BIL" because his brother in law supports Trump. Friends of many years suddenly are angry with each other over politics, destroying what they'd built over the years. Your poem exagerates the situation, showing how rediculous it is to make a religion out of politics. Well done. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Thanx,
Steve

Thank you Steve for all the points you made above and for commenting on my poem.

I see the divide in my own family. My brother in law voted for Brexit and now it is a subject he won't speak about. His opinions are firmly fixed to ideology and he has recently admitted to voting for Brexit because it fits with his racist opinion.

My other brother in law is also a Brexit supporter, although he didn't get off his couch to vote. He can't see further than his hatred of anyone who is not like him and he openly dislikes me because I challenge him.

In the UK Brexit is a festering sore that bubbles under the surface of political, media and social structures, all we can do is watch as the country falls further into decay.

Ruby :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

author comment
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