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THE DAY THE POETS DIED
I heard the sound of pages turning
from writers' alcoves everywhere
where the dim night lights were burning
and poets laid their deep souls bare.
Then there came that final day
when verse and music both were done.
Had bards not heard their parents say
be sure to not look in the sun?
That fierce light burned their muse to cinders
and dried the ink within their quill
regardless of their age or genders
without vision they'd lost their will.
No more poems of nature's beauty
no more describing stars above
no writes of those who died for duty
no heart felt words about true love.
I still recall that final sunset
and how all the people cried
filled with sorrows and regret
on that day the poets died.
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage:
Workshop:
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Comments
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2012-02-08 23:08
Love this
"The day the poets died" is a perfect title befitting your well written poem. Reading was a joy, right to the very end, then I got the quivers brcause If the sun like an eclipse of the light in the minds eye of a poet blind the ability to create great poetry like this one, would indeed be a sad day.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
scribbler
Thu, 2012-02-09 07:43
hi Barb
Hesitated psting this because wes beat me to it , but he used the singular poet. Kinda shows how even 1 letter difference in a title can lead to such different poems I guess.............stan
author commentBarbara Writes
Thu, 2012-02-09 11:20
I certainly glad you used it
The idea of all poets died really stand out. Brilliant poetry
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
Bonitaj
Thu, 2012-02-09 04:27
Scribbler!
A brilliant rendition of using the title to a good end!
How well you've captured the theme in this particular verse:
"That fierce light burned their muse to cinders
and dried the ink within their quill
regardless of their age or genders
without vision they'd lost their will"
BRAVO
Bonitaj
scribbler
Thu, 2012-02-09 07:45
hi Boni
I hope not Too brilliant as the muse is negatively phototrophic lol............stan
author commentChina Blue
Thu, 2012-02-09 19:21
Stan
This is so very excellent, there is nothing I would add, suggest or change it is perfect
I actually felt saddened
Chrys
Chrys
Let your mercy spill on all these burning hearts in hell(Leonard Cohen)
scribbler
Thu, 2012-02-09 22:42
Hello
There's a line or two that need some work but thanks for saying such kind words. Always good to have a poem elicit intended emotion..............stan
author comment