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Dajjal

Soon, Dajjal will come.
Oh colossal will he become
Over Adam, no he won’t be shy
No place but two left to hide

Call out to the police
“Oh no, they are corrupted, Denise!”
Man, you won’t be prepared
I will go to Madina, this land will be shared
No, in Madina he won’t come in
Growing less time until he arrives

But, until he comes
Entitled will man become

Ah, many will lose
Won’t be one of those fools
Aware I will be
Returning of He (AS)
Enter to what the world will become.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
so I’m testing out this format that I made up. I don’t really have a name for it. Basically, it’s a rhyming poem, but the rhyme can be in any pattern, and the starting words and/or the ending words spell a sentence and each stanza is a word. I’m pretty new to poetry all by itself, and I think it’ll be fun to try this out. This time, the first word (not symbol) will spell the sentence.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Hello manofgod, interesting poem. I'm not very fond of religious poems because they tend to set up arguments, but you're welcome to post them all the same.
Welcome to Neopoet, I don't believe I've read your poems before. I'll have to google Dajjal, haven't heard of him. I love to learn about new spirituality.
The title, spacing and the format you're experimenting with are good.
I'll return, Gracy

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

ok. ty for being honest

author comment

new and creative styles of writing poetry where the poet actually has a pattern in mind that they are adhering to as they write. Well done! I have to say I am mystified because the only person in the poem who's name I recognized is Adam. XD Because this pattern is yours and I mostly critique in meter and rhyme, I won't shove my oar in for fear of correcting something that is, in your pattern, not flawed. Unlike Gracy, I actually really, really like religious poetry, so do keep it up! I look forward to reading more. ;D
~
PS - I just realized how the first letters of the verses spell words! :O Very clever!

"To reveal art and conceal the artist is art's true aim." Oscar Wilde

:)

author comment
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