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Creepy Crawly

All the thoughts that come and go
Like bugs scared by the light
When it is dark they creep in slowly but persistent
Finding the gaps, the holes in and out they go
A flicker of confidence or worth will freeze them
But only for an instant
They build back to their hurried pace looking for substance
Light of day comes and pushes them to their holes and cracks
a temporary reprieve while they wait and scrounge
you lay traps you, spray noxious fumes, and happy thoughts
it works for a few weeks, maybe, but they come back eventually
when you are most comfortable
make you feel like you are starting over again
you can’t really get rid of them but is there a way to live with them?

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

I love your analogy. very descriptive in language
and very thought provoking

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author comment

Brilliant, this. I can definitely feel the angst, and good imagery using little skittering bugs. There are a couple of flow changes for your consideration:

- they creep in slowly...persistently

- you lay traps, spray noxious fumes, and try happy thoughts
It works for a few weeks, maybe; but they come back when you're most comfortable

Welcome to our little family! Look forward to seeing more of your work.

-Jess

That Is good feedback this was a very rough draft did little to no editing or review thanks for the input.

author comment
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