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A Cornucopia of Contentment

Submitted by VanRyan on Mon, 2020-12-21 09:43

Contentment; such true essence
I have found in your horn of plenty!
Ecstasy exhilarates my mind,
rising zephyrs gently touch
upon my life’s shore—I have been
awakened by the vying morning sun.

Here is love and here is life,
here are my dreams, gently swayed
by calmest waters that lift
my life’s raft toward the heavens,
and at long last I may see
enrapturing visions—

Eyes—oh, blessed eyes of man
that can behold Elysium
whence all joy and pleasure
beyond measure come—
I am content.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 
Not actively editing
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Geezer

Mon, 2020-12-21 17:36

Geezer's picture
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this one; it makes me think of the early morning when the world is just waking up. I'm not sure that I would use the word [vying] in the line: "I have been awakened by the [vying] morning sun, unless you ae competing with the sun in awakening the world. ~ Geez.
.

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VanRyan

Mon, 2020-12-21 19:01

VanRyan's picture

thanks for reading. "Vying" as in "competing"? isn't the best choice of words, so, strike that. As to the rest? I'm trying to find a new style to go with my new identity as a writer, lol. Van

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