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Copper Head,

Copper Head…

Copper head in a classroom of dummies,
mother forgot to pack the yummie’s.
Shit! I’ll have some fun,
when I shows them my gun.
And the bullets empty their tummy’s.

Outside he meets the maths teacher,
bullets don't take long to reach her.
All those kids hid in the stores,
but my bullets take out the doors.
Here comes the soon to be dead preacher.

Copper head then walks down the street,
not happy with the shoes on his feet.
Hell, I’ll keep on firing,
my arms hardly tiring.
And god it does feel so sweet.

At home his mothers alone,
talking, again on a fucking phone.
A sharp pistol burst,
her head explodes first.
Ha due reverence to a mother i've shown.

Sirens blazing as they went past,
man those cop cars are fast.
I’ve only hit two,
but the blood surely flew.
Then behind I hear a loud blast.

Put the gun to my head,
tis time I was dead.
Their inside my doors,
can’t fight any mores.
Gee, wish I could’ve heard what was said.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
He didn't check social the media...
Editing stage: 


sorry about that Roscoe.
Maybe it was a bit too confronting, especially to Americans. Maybe it was because we changed the Undiscovered list and it just got lost.
I would consider including your Last few words as:
I didn't check social my media...
although that would make it even more confronting.
Child mass murderers either cite "I don't like Mondays" or "I wanted to be famous".

Swapping between first and third person doesn't quite work.
Otherwise a well written and interestingly structured piece. Did you choose to make each verse in near limerick form?

A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'

I don't remember what form I decided on, I think I was sort of thinking how it would sound in the murderers head. I will give it a bit more work now that it has resurfaced. Regards Roscoe....

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

author comment

I remember that girl from that time...
"switched to overload"

not sure...It is interesting to surmise what goes on inside
people that take others lives
I love the head hunters
psychology...psychiatry..detective and those people
men and women who hunt for the killers
and those that interview them too
see what makes them tick
if they tick at all

the do not see the world as we
see the world
they are in a completely different
realm....we the living
and non killers abide by the
set of rules
throw that working set out
too get inside that dialogue
its very uncomfortable
and very hard..

sherlock holmes I like

King wrote a lot of good
books on the subject
and Straub....
Anne rice although a
different genre

Thank U!

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