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chicken -egg --Love- lust

Submitted by lovedly on Sun, 2017-06-18 16:20

Very long, long, love
and
coupled with lust
no one can do without either
you also specify
a dagger and pit
are miles apart
yes till they join
the eventuality of all
love and lust
culmination

well done Lover poet
you come first
lust only follows
like I do

shall love to know
what comes first
love or lust
to many it's
lust love another
to some love then lust
becomes must

A man today is no different
than yesterday
come in love coat lust
or vice versa
all play
the end is always the same
you know it
the night falls
we slumber
for a second day's number

lust and love chase each other
O
Lover brother
Without the two
how will lovers,you
man and woman
ever produce
so lust and love are human
produce

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

wesley snow

Sun, 2017-06-18 18:30

wesley snow's picture
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So many of them are unnecessary. Still, a good subject.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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lovedly

Sun, 2017-06-18 21:55

lovedly's picture

today has been a busy day
shall soonly

why have
soon sooner soonest
hence I coined
soonly
This does also convey
doesn't it

author comment

Eumolpus

Sun, 2017-06-18 22:58

Eumolpus's picture

For me, in a what is a poem about eroticism vs love I might include some personal imagery, other than
pole and a hole. The lust and love need some poetic definition

I feel the strongest stanza is :

all play
the end is always the same
you know it
the night falls
we slumber
for a second day's number

That kind of nonchalance really has a personal touch to it.

We know we have the biological need to do it, but this love/lust chasing themselves around is a good start. I think there's a lot more to be said about their connection which belongs to you.
I love the idea of lover poet
Go with it!

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

lovedly

Sun, 2017-06-18 23:48

lovedly's picture

Shall rethink pole and hole
yes may seem to perverted

author comment

lovedly

Sun, 2017-06-18 23:55

lovedly's picture

reread will all
of you
so passionately

author comment

Scatterhatter

Mon, 2017-06-19 02:42

Oh lovedly
I love your poetry!
But
You must know (As you mention your wised age...).

A meeting of minds comes
First
Desire (only) can make some people misfire
But with mind and body coiled to one
Musk

Long lust love
Love long lust
Lust love long
Must

Forever it (bee) comes

lovedly

Mon, 2017-06-19 09:24

lovedly's picture

Long lust love
Love long lust
Lust love long
Must

Forever it (bee) comes

author comment
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