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BUBBA (for wes who thinks I'm in a rut)

Bubba is a good ol' boy
who lives not far away
in his life he finds much joy
in an unusual way.

You see Bubba knows everybody
that you might think to mention
('specially after a night toddy
which dilutes his attention).

A friend of his got tired of this
NO one can know everyone
So he decided he'd fix this
and shut up the favorite son.

So one nite at the local bar
while Bubba talked of all those he knew,
His buddy thought he's gone to far
And told Bubba"Wait a minute you!"

You claim that you know all these fellers
But there's no way you can
I'll bet you one two hundred dollars
that you don't know a certain man.

Bubba said I'll take your bet
just tell me his name
'cause there's no one I haven't met
so let's start this game.

His bud said Burt Reynolds is someone
I'll bet you don't know
Bubba said well you're wrong son
I met him many years ago

After a football game at Florida State
where Burt played for four good years
we shared BBQ post game, and wait!
we even bought each other beers.

There was only one sure way to check
the truth of Bubba's claim
So they both said what the heck
and to Jupiter Florida they came.

And drove right up to Burt's door
and then rang the bell
Burt opened up and for sure
said Hi BUBBA, I hope all's going well.

Two hundred bucks now down the drain
And Bubba's buddy was non-plussed
and gave up to all the strain
and in his mind he stewed and cussed.

Same old bar another day
Bubba buying beers with his winning
His buddy grimaced up to say
Burt was only the beginning.

Bubba I know you're a home body
and have never left the south
so you Can't know everybody
I bet $1,000 I'll shut your mouth.

I've given it a lot of thought
and even asked your momma
now at last I have you caught
you don't know Barak Obama.

Bubba smiled and said you're wrong
I went to Chicago only once
but I wasn't there too long
before I shared a pew with that dunce.

Again, only one way to know
So they caught a flight to D.C.
then went on a white house tour so
they might get a glimpse and see.

And as they walked with the tour group
way down a hall Barak walked by
and Bubba gave a great big whoop
Hey Barak, what's happening guy!

Obama yell'ed Well Bubba's here!
and calmed the secret service down
then turned to Michelle and said Dear
look ol' Bubba's back in town!

Now Bubba's friend was really steamed
$1,000 hard come but easy went.
For two weeks all he did was dreamed
of finally seeing Bubba bent.

He scratched on his old gray balding head
till his fingers almost wore a rut
then he scratched somewhere else instead
and finally he scratched his butt.

Then in a piercing blinding light
he at last thought of the perfect name
with whom he could set Bubba right
and put bubba's brags to shame.

Heh, heh he thought I've got him now
but Bubba wasn't at the bar
he found him on his fishing scow
eating on a candy bar.

"THE POPE!" he yelled"you don't know him!"
Bubba said "I met him in the war,
even then I thought him dim."
Then took another bite of his Mars bar.

His buddy (Jim) just laughed out loud
$10,000 says you're full of sh&t.
Bubba said he wasn't proud
there's just one way we can prove it.

Two tickets to Rome sure ain't cheap
but they bought them anyway
"Anything to shut up that old creep
is worth anything I pay"...............thought Jim

They land then on to St. Peter's square
The pope was due to bless the throng
Bubba told Jim "See that balcony there?
You'll see me with the Pope ere long"

About fifteen minute flew on by
and there beside the Pope soon stood
Bubba grinning fit to die
just like he told Jim he would.

But down there among the crowd
Bubba saw Jim lying prone
so toward the Pope he quickly bowed
And said "My friend's down there alone"

The Pope said" Well go on to him
but it was good to see you here."
So Bubba rushed on down to Jim
trying his best to hide his fear.

At last he got to his friend's side
just as Jim was coming to
among the throng, the human tide
Jim said Bubba is that you?

Bubba was so darn relieved
as he took his buddy's arm
and told him he'd never believed
seeing him with the pope would cause him harm!

Jim looked at Bubba, shook his head
then laughed weakly to the sky
saying what near shocked him dead
was when he heard some old Italian guy
ask" Who's that standing next to Bubba?"

***Blame Wes for this, he said I needed to write about something different

Editing stage: 


An old joke huh? Superb. And it even sported some length.
Thank you Stan. No one has ever written a poem for me.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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I had no idea how widely this joke had spread but figured at least it's not nature based lol. Now I can let rip some more "comfort zone " stuff without your nagging (just kidding)..........stan

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