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birth love life and peaceful rest

The ink of love, okay life
May you alone win
if that's all the purpose of your destiny.
For me birth and death are totally linked
by the one and only ink
of love passion and satisfaction
when one is born to a world unknown...
we all know there is no purpose
for our coming,
except to enjoy love of mummy
she would die to see her child happy
and then the siblings amass love
and then when as we grow
the lust of lovers almost kills us so
and once we also mow
we fresher ones sow

Later comes the departure of our parents
we shed tears of sorrow
to the solar system of energy we return
but then once we realise
they also came to go
we smile
and as life catches up
we become sans all
and that's all what is the midstream
now you know
love and life
both separate
and from the earthly sojourn we leave our place
for the youth we had seeded
and for us now life has ceded...
birth love or life
we come to live and learn ere
we finally go to attain eternal peace!

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

very hard to comment as I don't agree with the poem's message but you did bring it out in your own way.

Alid

u r ur MASTER
Alidz

author comment

A grand write from your pen, might the last line be changed to something along the lines of universal love and energy,
Eternal peace is very boring lol, if it's like that I shall return to the Earth plain to seek out a rhythm of excitement.
Take care young Bard an excellent write.
Yours Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

kindly suggest your line
shall not undermine

author comment

I think that you are able to write a last line that will seem eternal but give a sense of mystery and life..
We continue this sojourn in another sphere,
Take care out there, Yours Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

apply my mind soonly

author comment
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