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Birds (indirect imagery)

Plaintive cries of want and challenge drift through misted wood and meadow

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

This is pretty direct to me. Let's see what others think

and changed the first word. Any better?
I think I may be too literal of a person, when it comes to imagery.

Respectfully, Jim

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

author comment

Sometimes indirect or unspoken imagery can be more powerful than direct imagery simply because it allows a reader to visualize things which are specific to themselves

sounds like there is a duel afoot in a clearing in them thar woods! I like it!

brightest blessings.
Cat

When you fling poo, some of the stink sticks to you!

"The Book of Styx" can be ordered and purchased on line at:
http://eddystyx.mythramuse.com/

Cat!

Respectfully, Jim

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

author comment

that edit has worked brilliantly.
Jx

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