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The Big Event

It's not that you are ignored by God,
It's just like before the war sharpening the sword,
He is preparing you for the best,
So strengthen yourself forget the rest,
Remember mango doesn't ripen in a day,
Frogs too wait for rain,
Don't let your days weaken in vain,
Patience for the big event is yet to happen!

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Comments

but two suggestions
firstly
the title should be just
two or three words

secondly
now a days we don't fight with swords ...
Mahabharata is long sealed
use some weapons of today
missiles have gone a long way

your thoughts are good anyway

loved

I am glad you posted this one , as I had suggested when I read it not so long ago...because it would provide a lot of encouragement who are going through some rough weather in their lives....

perhaps you may want to give a thought to tweak up the Title...just a thought..

cheers..

raj (sublime_ocean)

I have no problem with the use of the word "sword" it fits in well with the language of the poem. Also it has the majesty of age that the use of a more modern weapon may not have. They say Jesus would not return as a man of peace but with a sword. Maybe that says more about our humanity or lack of it. There is a masterplan, just trust in that I think your poem says. Just as Raj says I agree.

Be well... John

I may think about a change for the title. But thats up to you. Thanks for sharing.

John

Hi loved,

Thank you for your suggestion, would surely give a thought over it :)

Cheers,

Kavi

author comment

This one's out of my own experience, when I actually was going through such a phase in my life. Yes everyone do experience this at some point in life.

And poems have been my only way to let out my feelings till date, which will continue too...

Cheers,

Kavi

author comment

When you are responding to any comment, I suggest you do that via the "reply" link below the respective comment, to connect your reply to the specific comment, like I have done now.

It is good to know that you use the medium of poetry as a therapy and as a means of expression, which I believe must be a comforting experience.

Cheers..

raj (sublime_ocean)

Thanks again, I wasn't aware of it. Henceforth will do so. Yes it feels great letting out them in form of poem and below are the line I have used for my blogs:

A heart filled of thousands of feelings,
which sometimes are difficult in dealing,
some nourish them, Some dry them,
and some let them free.. Through poems like me...:)

Cheers,

Kavi

author comment

The poem above nicely profiles why you use poetry as a medium to express feelings and emotions. Since it is part of your blog, I hesitate to make a couple of suggestions.

Keep writing...

raj (sublime_ocean)

Raj, please do not hesitate to suggestion. Suggestions are always welcome.

Cheers,

Kavi

author comment

Ok. Give me some time and I will do that.

raj (sublime_ocean)

I have attempted to offer a modified version, retaining the essence. So I think, don't know if it works for you

A heart filled of thousands of feelings,
[A heart filled with some thousand feelings],
which sometimes are difficult in dealing,
[at times much beyond overwhelming],
some nourish them, Some dry them,
[some soothe, some mute],
and some let them free.. Through poems like me...:)
[and some flow in the poems of Me]

I liked your poem. Reading it feels like opening a bottle of fragrance..

Keep writing, keep expressing, release the fragrance of your poems for others to inhale..

raj (sublime_ocean)

That really sounds great! I'll use it :) thank you so much Raj

author comment

Good to hear your wow of approval. No thanks, i just tweaked it up a bit, the essence is in your write, a smile will do..

keep writing..and smiling..

raj (sublime_ocean)

Agree with you... the 'sword' fitted well in there, so used it. And about the title yes i would give a thought to change it...:)

Cheers,

Kavi

author comment

Hi everyone out there... a heartfelt thanks for all the support. With such a guidance am sure the budding poets would really turn out to be gems.

Loads of love,

Kavi

author comment

I really think with some work this can be a really good poem

I have outlined below a few suggestions they are only suggestions if you don't like them ignore them :)

Remember mango doesn't ripe in a day, --- Suggestion
remember mango doesn't [ripen] in a day

Frogs too await for rains, --- suggestion
[frogs too wait for rain]

Don't let your days weaken you going in vain, --- suggestion
[Don't let your days weaken in vain]

Patience for the big is yet to happen -- suggestion
[Patience for the big event is yet to happen]

I have streamlined some lines for flow and grammar purposes

I also thought another title could be "The Big Event"

just a thought, nice work hun

love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

Hi Serendipity,

Thank you so much for the valuable suggestion. I have made the suggested changes. :)

Cheers,
Kavi

author comment

The changes have surely worked for you. I am just wondering if the last line can be shortened and sharpened a wee bit. Let me scratch my head and see if something worthy comes out of it.

Cheers!

raj (sublime_ocean)

I don't know if it works for you, if not ignore it

It's not that you are ignored by God,
It's more like sharpening the sword before a war,
He prepares you for the best,
for the litmus test.
So strengthen yourself and forget the rest,
Remember mango doesn't ripen in a day,
Frogs too await the rain,
Don't let your days weaken in vain,
May patience be the harbinger
to usher in the big event round the corner!

Cheers,

raj (sublime_ocean)

Thank your for valuable suggestion will think over it :)

Cheers,

Kavi

author comment

this poem is reminding the heart to be patient. Refreshing.Love it. enuff said...

Alid

Alid :)

Cheers,
Kavi

author comment
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