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BATTLESHIPS OF THUNDER

Woolly heavens, your sensuous softness
envelops my muddled mind,
swathes it in the immense expanse of grey,
swept into the gaps of blue,
tossed like beaten cream into the cumulus explosions
of billowy, slow moving battle ships of thunder.

I roll about not knowing a way out,
sucked into sudden vortexes of thermal drifts,
shot up high to sense a weightlessness,
suspended in air,
my body shaped and reshaped by the elements,
dies a death of joy,
no cares to pin me down to earth,
no sunbeams to bedazzle, no dashing rains to wash me,
just feather-brushed by the dew of that great goddess sky,
cradled in her ample bosom.

As the pressure rises, the damp machine
begins to pant and gasp, steam passes,
a squeal of the opening overture
as lightening screams it's echoes all around me,
petrifying my nerves, searing my thoughts in two,
rolled like a catapulted stone, falling,
falling through to earth at high speed,
the scene lit up as if in some strange theatre, unreal,
stones flying, birds and bats flapping,
lashing waters polish the view,
dizzy, I stumble to the nearest tree as if drunk,
yet drunk in the excitement of it all.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Last few words: 
A storm in Oslo all round the city was tremendous, like going to the Opera at La Scala, have never done that but I imagine it was a similar sound.
Editing stage: 

Comments

Awesome imagery! You took us deep into the inner turmoil of a storm - there is so much lovely imagery here. I really can't pick a best line or stanza. I would bookmark this if I knew how!

I can't see anything to critique.

Wonderful job

Love Mand xxxx

This is just brilliant !! I love the images you share with us, this is one of the best I have read in quite some time your imagery is superlative, its always a pleasure to read your poetry but you took me into the heart of the storm I can only imagine the show that it put on, I love storms I am one of those fools who stand outside in the middle of it all wondering at the power of it all.

lovely to read you again, I didn't know you had been unwell I wish you a speedy recovery and hope your out walking once again

love and hugs JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

Me too, me too Jayne, it was so splendid,
like watching a choir of hundreds strong in a Grand great Opera.
Thrilling is the word.

Love to you and I wish you some good thunder storms,
but don't go getting hit by any of them then!!!

Love Ann (better day by day)

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

author comment

I too, can feel the force and tumultuous nature of the storm through your writing.

I myself, prefer "vortices" to "vortexes" especially with the rest of the line (thermal drifts)

also, meteorlogically, "as the pressure falls" would indicate a stengthening of the storm, although "pressure rising" is more poetic.

a very exciting piece

Al

I checked spelling Al, and it didn't correct that, it worried me because I meant vortices, and wasn't totally sure how to spell it, so there you are, I shall correct it straight away.

I beg to use Poetic Licence, with the pressure rising, however illogical it might appear to the meteorologist. :)

Thank you fro joining me in the thunder, the wild sea is exciting too, I love to 'ride the waves' with the ship.

Love Ann

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

author comment
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