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Balance

Submitted by top.ksgnr on Thu, 2017-08-10 00:39

What do I want?
I ask this to myself every day.
Do I want to have ten cars in my drive way?
Do I want a wife?
Do I want kids?
Do I want to go partying every weekend?
Do I want to enjoy a good book on my porch?

Well…

I want that and much more.

I know that I want to be the father that I never had.
I know that I want a beautiful wife to love eternally.
I do want to go out and enjoy myself once in a while.
And I do want to enjoy a good book. Many good books.

But I also know that life happens.
And that im not going to get everything that I want.
I also know that I can’t do anything about it.
But if there is one thing I know.
It is that I can balance myself.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Not actively editing

Comments

Eumolpus

Thu, 2017-08-10 13:05

Eumolpus's picture

welcome to poetry. You have a poetic narrative here, a "list poem" similar to those we use in Biblio therapy. It is honest, shows self awareness, two essentials to becoming a poet.

Consider in your work the love of words and images to paint a picture of what you want to say. Your work is more of a journal entry, a train of thought. It IS a type of poetry. Today, anything that "feels" like a poem IS a poem. As you expand your craft through "many good books" you will discover poetry may not "get you what you want...but it might get you what you need." (Thanks Mick!)

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

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