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Got a stone in my shoe
it came in through a hole.
Deliberating what I’ll do,
with my wandering soul.

The hole in my shoe
it lets in fresh air.
That sure is one sole,
I don’t need to repair.

As long as the sun shines,
I’ll keep this holed footwear.
I can truly say it’s mine,
my own cross to bare.

Don’t believe in the cross,
does that mean I’ve no soul.
Not a great big loss,
still feel like I’m whole.

I’ve never needed a god,
to make me feel good.
Don’t at all feel odd,
don’t see why I should.

I believe I’m the same,
as any other being.
I just wish I could tame,
peoples need for an all seeing.

I sometimes feel like crying,
as people talk of what they’ve found.
And their belief when dying,
really does astound.

Getting back to my shoe,
the fact it needs repaired.
I’ll leave it up to you,
can two souls be compared.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
Believe it or not.....
Editing stage: 


I like this one a lot... reads very easily (a few grammatical fixes...i.e. mines/mine...
I think the grammar is more important here than a perfect rhyme!
this seems a little different in style. I like these shorter lines...for IMPACT

the way you put this together, the plot-theme, is interesting and engaging.



Glad you enjoyed Al and i agree with you about the changes, Regards Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

author comment

it gives a real feel for the meandering of the thought process -
the short line format fits the theme very well - a short word association carried out by the mind
and i love the association - sole to soul

i do agree with Al re the grammar - i too think it is more important than perfect rhyme

not sure about the title - do you have a subtext i'm not reading? otherwise i think you might do better with something that pertains to holes in souls??? lol - just a thought..
love judy

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

Thank you judy, and yes it did just trip off like a meandering thought. Love Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

author comment
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