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Anticipation

Secretly
I lay
A pink Hibiscus
In my lovers bath
My heart races
With delightful
Anticipation

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
This poem actually is a true snapshot of my wedding night, my wife was undressing and I poured her a bubble bath. The hibiscus and bubble bath I had pre planned... It worked as planned
Editing stage: 

Comments

Seems like romance is still alive in remote corners of the globe, a good small write Welcome to out site and I hope to see many more writes and your interaction with many of us, Yours Ian.T

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Thank you Bud for your critique, I look forward to writing more and learning more form reading other poets work. Thank you so much. Buddha...

author comment

Love the whimsical way you wrote this lovely Imitate piece

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

Thank you so very much Barbara for your critique. I love to write Haiku and will start again soon. Buddha...

author comment

Stop by my workshop collaborative poetry writing (renga) anytime and share your haiku.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

Buddha had returned
as if he were still unmarried
trying to make amends
to his lovely wife

I loved your critique Lovedly, My wife inspires everything I do including writing poetry. Buddha

author comment

hope u will stay

Good one. Keep on writing!

Alid

I wish more husbands would pen emotions. Lovely

Thank you for your comment. I really appreciate your response. Some men have trouble with emotions, I grew up with a father who did not encourage or tollerate emotions from anyone in the family. My wife helped me through that and I am still learning.

author comment
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