Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Always Alone

He promised that he'd help her, but he won't stay
Soon he'll be gone, so where would she lay?
Would she cry in her bedroom all filled with need?
Or will she punish herself and make herself bleed?
He is tearing her apart limb from limb
And she's drowning because she doesn't know how to swim
Don't they see that she's sinking?
Why won't they help her?
What are they thinking?
She's sick and tired of saying "I'm fine"
Look into her eyes, don't you see all the lies?
Show her what love is because she's never known
All she knows is that she is alone
Don't tell her that you promise
Because in the end it'll be anonymous
Don't let her hurt herself more
Because you took her heart and threw it to the floor
Why would you lie to her and tell her you care
When you know that you weren't really going to be there?
Can't you stop and tell the truth?
Hold her hand and pull her through?
You kept her alive, but for how long?
None of that matters now because soon she will be gone

Review Request (Intensity): 
Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 


I sprained my memory by recalling how it felt to be a teen. I think most who are going through this part of life tend to feel isolated no matter how many friends they have. But the truth is that nobody is truly alone. But it Can feel that way while dealing with emotions one hasn't felt before. Your poem shows this , thankfully temporary, angst well.......stan PS now to take a pain reliever for overtaxed memory lobes lol

A good write of maybe it happened to me.
A few breaks here and there would help the reader.
Another thing it sounds like a cry from a heart that is hurting, this theme is good and is written ok.
Just a tidy and a thought of the reader and all will be fine, Great for your age.
Yours as always, Ian

Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

I found this poem very well done! The rhyming was very good and I liked how it progressed. Sad, of course, but very enjoyable to read.

Teens are really struggling in the world. Hang on, it gets better!

I don't know what to say. It's very touching. Take well...

raj (sublime_ocean)

(c) No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.