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All I Need Is You.

Quiet meal, just the two of us
is something we still like to share.
It’s always easier to be ourselves
When no one else is there.

Slow dance, is still our favourite dance.
you and I together, me holding you near.
While you listen as I softly whisper
words of love in your ear.

Gentle passion, that’s how we want it
when you share your love with me.
Still romantic and always tender.
That’s how we like it to be.

Night falls and you share my pillow
feels good holding you close, like I do
Dawn breaks and then you kiss me
and I know, all I need is you.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 


Thank you Ian.

author comment

Have read it again 3 years later and it is still good for me.
Since then I went out of Neopoet for a while a couple of days actually that's why this one had only one comment, Yours as usual Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Thanks Ian,
Very kind of you to revisit my poem, I've been missing due to Internet failure but all working now.

author comment

so difficult to achieve without stepping into the doggies doo of sentimentality.
A couple of minor stumbles in meter that I'm sure you could fix quite easily. Can you hear them?
Well done sir!

A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'

Jess, thank you for visiting my poems, always appreciated. Been missing due to Internet failure but sorted now with new supplier.
This I wrote for my wife, reflecting our long term and now mature love for each other, which has stood the test of time for over 40 years!
Yes, probably a bit sentimental for you, but your comment is encouraging. It's nice we can all be different but enjoy this poetry thing together in our own way.
Take care mate,

author comment

Lol - no doggie-doo sentimentality here. I really like this - almost brings a lump to my throat

My only suggestion is to drop 'you and i' from the second verse of stanza 2 for meter's sake.... i don't see any major problems with the other lines,...

Really like the ending...

Lovely to be reading you again timbo
Love judy

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

Thank you for commenting on this poem which reflects my long term relationship with my wife.
Been together a very long time yet now!
I see what you mean and the 'you and I', will give it some thought,
take care,

author comment

Just lovely - romantic, sentimental and a story of eternal love.

Well done :)

LOve Mand xxxx

Thank you Mand, lovely to here from you again.

author comment
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