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An Afternoon Extrordinaire

there is a lonely spot
off the beaten path

a small meadow
a single tree
and me

I sit
back to trunk
in rest
as shadows
slowly pirouette
and thoughts wander
as they will
to places pleasant
in which to ponder

a sense of bliss
arises within
and I realize
that we
the tree and me
are both exquisitely
happy

no rhyme nor reason
can I apply
to satisfy
the how or why
but as I stand
to leave
lt seems
the tree
is waving
good-bye
to me

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Comments

Nice expression of simple moment of joy expressed elegantly. Nice connection with the tree. A favorite philosopher Krishnamurti once remarked one of the most difficult things to do is appreciate a tree, connect with a tree, without naming it, or categorizing it. And that you have done.

I would definitely drop the first two lines, beginning the poem

a small meadow
a single tree
and me

That immediately set the scene, we can tell you are alone there. Kind of like the way the Rubaiyat uses "A loaf of bread/a jug of wine/ and thou" to open a poem.

I also would consider a different title. No suggestions, nor do I think I should.

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

An elegant simple poem. The random rhymes move it along effortlessly, easily. I don't try to rhyme much in my own work because it seems to distort what I'm trying to say, but maybe I'll try it this way...it seems almost unintentional.

with Empy. Drop the first two lines. The title? Ehhhh. But I am assuming that you felt the afternoon WAS extraordinary. And why not? Leaning back against a tree, if you do not find a certain connection with one of the most extraordinary forms of life on the planet, then you truly do not appreciate the superb gift that Mother Nature has given us. ~ Gee.
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I'd not drop those first two lines as they tell of the isolation of the tree's location. I Would change the title by using a word opposite of extraordinary. By doing so it might just add emphasis to the fact that the day was far from ordinary..............stan

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