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The Abyss

The Abyss is tame
I do not fear the abyss
And it does not fear me
Many times,
We drink whiskey together
And talk about old times
I've watched the abyss bury my friends
Such talent
Such remorse
One day the abyss will come for me
And I will welcome it with open arms

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

is very somber and somewhat profound.~ Geezer.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

I am not a fan of using the word abyss so many times may I suggest something like

line 2 I do not fear it
I've watched that scoundrel bury etc etc
otherwise not bad
a warm Neo Poet welcome to you

Chrys

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i like this. i agree on not using word abyss so much. i would just use the word it. i would love to see you add lines maybe
i stare at it
it stares at me
give a nod to nietzsche (sorry i know it is misspelled)

I agree with the above. Maybe experiment by only using the word abyss in the title. In the body use "it" or other references to really draw out the stark mood. I do think it is worthy of adding some more lines as well...

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