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0521200013.0528pm

squid ink stains novel / mirror phrase Calypso shark / pirate ship coins found.

Last few words: 
Haiku meter is supposed to have seventeens syllables. No exceptions-- maybe a syllable more but never less. My haiku will always be an observation about people, family and events I always post the date on my writing like a Dewey decimal library item.
Editing stage: 

Comments

are you the chief of Haiku police?

syllables are not directly correlated to the "on" of Japanese

you write the way you want, others, as they want.

All your Haiku may be beautiful and brilliant, but that has nothing to do with an arbitrary syllable count

I refuse to be intimidated by you, or anyone else's literary mandates, dictums or
proclamations.

by the way, welcome to Neopoet.
I hope you enjoy it as much as I do (when I am here)
there are so many wonderful people/ poets to engage with...
and we all want our say...and how we say it!

I could have been gentler with my remarks...but let's keep it real
we're all big boys and girls

stay tough (not mean)

till the next time,

Al

Your write is spot on for the number of syllables,
but this is a Senryu,
a Haiku is about the four seasons

squid ink stains novel
mirror phrase Calypso shark
pirate ship coins found.

Yours Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

traditional haiku is about the four seasons. This is modern haiku. Look at current collections available.

author comment

Like has already been mentioned, traditional
haiku was normally about nature with the
17 syllable count ... but like everything else,
it has evolved.

The essence of haiku is "cutting" (kiru).[1] This is often represented by the juxtaposition of two images or ideas and a kireji ("cutting word") between them,[2] a kind of verbal punctuation mark which signals the moment of separation and colours the manner in which the juxtaposed elements are related.
Traditional haiku consist of 17 on (also known as morae though often loosely translated as "syllables"), in three phrases of 5, 7, and 5 on respectively.[3]
A kigo (seasonal reference), usually drawn from a saijiki, an extensive but defined list of such terms.
Modern Japanese haiku (現代俳句 gendai-haiku?) are increasingly unlikely to follow the tradition of 17 on or to take nature as their subject[citation needed], but the use of juxtaposition continues to be honored in both traditional and modern haiku.[4] There is a common, although relatively recent, perception that the images juxtaposed must be directly observed everyday objects or occurrences.[5]

Not sure I get the poem, probably just me.
Also not sure why you'd name your poem
with date. How are we to see the passion
when you're not even proud enough to
give your poem a unique name.

When I wrote this I did not have a title or theme like I do nowadays. I date all my writing with a personal Dewey decimal note on the page

author comment

You can edit your poem and it will
enable a review section where the
original and the edited can be viewed
along side one another ...
pretty cool feature.

Let me call it Johnny Quest jock cool stroll. Little pun on Jacques Cousteau. Johnny Quest was one of my favorite TV cartoons before remote control.

author comment
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