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Virtual Pagan Protection For a Candle Witch I Know
her's is a flame that splinters night,
unflickering and solid in our hearts
to make the darkest of us bright
and unify our shattered parts
she casts the gleam of cleansing light
her candles bring into our dark
with unrelenting sense of right
no lies can ever mar or mark,
for all of us she is deep prayers
lifted up on chanted lips afar
rising in the moonbeam cares
of gleaming poem and candle star.
So here I make a circle of protection,
strong against all hateful gossip's blame
stand with us in its center, Candle Witch,
and share with us your warming flame.
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Earth Vicinity (within a five light-year radius)
Favorite Poets
John Donne, T.S. Eliot, Serendipity, Emily Dickenson, Kailashana, Charles Bukowski, Kabir, Rett, Dalton, W. B. Yeats, William Blake, Rainer Maria Rilke, and many other Neopoet poets; Neopoet has heavily influenced my poetry and my ability to write it well.
Comments
Geezer
Thu, 2011-10-20 18:01
Very nice...
You have captured the spirit that she embodies, the wish for all to live in peace and harmony.
A few little niggles... How about simplifying the last line of the first stanza, and lose that magnificent word [myriad]? [I am sure that you can find another poem for it]. Just say: and unify our shattered parts.
You could also switch the last line of the third stanza around a little, and say: For all of us, she is deep prayers. Last line of the third stanza, how about just leaving the word [of] off? All are just suggestions, just a little something to ease the rythm. ~ Gee
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Race_9togo
Fri, 2011-10-21 02:58
Thanks Gee,
I needed your critique, I made some changes and it does flow more smoothly.
Respectfully, Race
"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo
author commentRace_9togo
Fri, 2011-10-21 03:00
Thanks Lonnie
Not me though, my friend, just her.
She prayed loud and warm for me when I was sick, and I felt her prayer.
Just returning the favor.
Respectfully, Race
"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo
author commentRace_9togo
Mon, 2011-10-24 15:19
:)
Thanks hun.
Respectfully, Race
"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo
author commentHooded Stranger
Fri, 2011-10-21 13:55
Jim
Jim,
you have captured the true Cat in this piece.
The last stanza:
So here I make a circle of protection,
strong against all hateful gossip's blame
stand with us in its center, Candle Witch,
and share with us your warming flame.
is perfection!
I am also pleased to tell you that Cat has rescinded her resignation.
She has been overwhelmed by the response to her announcement and this poem goes a long way to express how we all feel about her.
Good job mate,
HS
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Race_9togo
Mon, 2011-10-24 15:20
Thanks Dan,
And thanks even more for letting us all know that cat will stay with us, and continue her leadership.
Respectfully, Race
"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo
author commentmagics02
Fri, 2011-10-21 16:16
Race
So here I make a circle of protection,
strong against all hateful gossip's blame
stand with us in its center, Candle Witch,
and share with us your warming flame.
This says it all and I surround that same circle of protection from all hate and gossip as well. Very nice job Jim. Love this.
Mona
Race_9togo
Mon, 2011-10-24 15:21
Thanks Mona,
Glad you like it!
Respectfully, Race
"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo
author commentCandlewitch
Sat, 2011-10-22 07:40
Dear Jim,
I am in awe of your words and struck humble by your praise and good wishes so poetically written. Thank you so very much for your support. It means a lot to me!
Brightest of Blessings to you,
love, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Race_9togo
Mon, 2011-10-24 15:18
Cat,
I've known you long enough to know that a) you mean a great deal to all of us, and b) the nastiness that you have been subjected to is both evil, and complete lies, garbage of the worst kind.
You are welcome, it is my pleasure and delight.
Respectfully, Race
"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo
author commentCandlewitch
Wed, 2011-11-09 11:04
*Hugs*
Thanks Rosi,
I love y'all too!
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.