Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

BAPTIZE HIM NOT

To baptize we were asked to learn
Catechism by heart and words of creed
Words born out of understanding the law
Graded in stages of one, two and three

We passed from Monday class to the next
Tuesday graduated to mature Wednesday
The holy book was read in native tongue
Difficult it was, I panicked all the time

Reading a verse each, I counted my turn
Rehearsed to flow if none missed the twirl
So it was my roll to read verse twelve
Steeped in nervousness, I said, ‘twelve verse’

The laughter that followed made me stupid
I offended no one nor sinned against God
Baptism exams date fixed for a Saturday
Superintendent Examiner asked my name

Who is your father and where is he
The civil war had him behind enemy line
So I wasn’t asked anything relevant at all
Not even my knowledge of the catechism

When names of those qualified to be reborn
In holy flowing river of baptismal bliss
Pasted in this particular House of God
Men had sat in council to remove my name

My cousins celebrated a landmark of faith
So swathed in sadness, the years tagged along
Till it unfolded a conspiracy, unearthing a fowl
Not to upset a staunch apostolic deacon dad

My aunty told the superintendent man of God
That my father won’t take it kindly with her
When and if he ever returned to see his only son
Initiated into a basilica of another denomination

You see, men took decision for God that day
In a sanctuary commonly labeled amongst us
House of God became a house full with men of means
They decided on a loss of faith for the weak and young

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

This is why I seldom go to church. Men assuming the duty of God in judging whether a person is deserving of grace. A very good poem in my opinion............stan

and it is getting more watered down by charlatans. Thanks for your comments and best wishes.

tr

A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.